The day or so after Emily left on her mission, I was so sad. More so, than I was when the other two kids left on their missions. I was very concerned about being sad. I kept questioning myself, “Why am I so sad? I know this will be a good thing, and that there isn’t anything better she could be doing with her time right now than serving the Lord.” One reason I kind of anticipated, is that Emily is my baby. I am done raising my children. I have gone from being the coach to cheering them on from the bleachers. I knew that someday I would be sad about this, but I also was hoping that I would be glad too. I also remembered that when my darlin’ and I took the Love Language test, I found out that my Love Language is time. Well, because I have had missionaries before, I know how long a year and a half is. I kept thinking that I don’t want her to be gone for that long. I will miss all that “time” with her.

Once I figured these two things out, I felt like I could be patient with myself. I understand that both of the things I’m struggling with would be hard for anyone to accept.

Now I feel peace.

I try not to focus on the struggle, and I just let Heavenly Father speak peace to my heart. And He is. I am so thankful. I know I can do this. I know that being a mom is one of the most important purposes of my life, and I am grateful for the opportunity. I enjoyed it as much as any mom could while I was in the middle of diapers and crying babies at night. I enjoyed snuggles and kisses, and “Mom, I love you’s.” Now I can enjoyed my adult children.

I can do hard things, like letting my daughter leave for a year and a half. I can spend time away from her, and I will be great!