Monthly Archives: August 2023

Uncles

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Uncle Anthony and niece Luna

Merriam Webster defines an uncle as: the brother of one’s father or mother, or the husband of one’s aunt or uncle.

When I thought about writing about my uncles, I didn’t realize it would be kind of a sad thing. I first thought about who my uncles are:

I had one maternal uncle.

I had 6 paternal uncles.

My Mama only had one sister, that means one uncle. I didn’t really know him very well. They lived a distance away and when we saw the family I was busy playing and having fun with my cousins.

My Daddy had two brothers and 5 sisters. In his family there were 6 uncles. Some of them lived far away in other states, from us. I only saw them a few times in my life and the others I never even met them. All of my uncles have passed on now.

Merriam Webster also says that an uncle is: one who helps, advises, or encourages.

I will say I really never had an experience like that with my uncles.

Maybe that’s why I feel like having family close is so important. I have 5 siblings, my sweetie has 6 siblings. That means there are many aunts and uncles and they all live (at least part time) within a few hours of us. My children have grown up knowing their uncles and aunts and having a relationship with them. I love that.

Family is so important to me. Building relationships and memories together is the glue that keeps a family happy and loving each other. It takes work. We used to see the family I grew up in often. We saw my darlin’s family often, now it’s a little less often. We all have our own families, grandkids and that is where the focus is.

As I’ve gotten older the effort of planning, and arranging get togethers is harder and more exhausting. It’s still worth it though. I know my kids love their uncles and have great relationships with them. I am so happy about that!

The last definition Merriam Webster gives for uncle is: used as a cry of surrender. I laughed out loud when I saw that. I guess that is where I’ll end this post. Life is tough. It is an ongoing effort to do your best to see everyone as often as you can, even uncles. When you want things a certain way or different than it is. I always thought I’d see all the family more, but I don’t always get to choose how things go. Everyones get to choose for themselves how much time they have for family. So with that, I’ll just say “uncle!” and surrender to what is. Uncles are wonderful and I’m glad they’re part of life.

Most Memorable District Meeting

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When you’re a missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, there are many meetings to go to. We would meet with our district about once a month and zone about once a quarter. Our district leaders were two young men, also full time missionaries.They would check to see how we were doing, and give us counsel. They would give us a little lesson, pertaining to how to be our best as missionaries.

One meeting one of the district leaders asked us if we’d like a piece of cake. Of course we said, “Yes, please!” The cake was on the table where we could all see it. It was decorated very nice with the word Gospel written across it with icing. The elder proceeded to bring out a beautiful china plate and carefully slice the cake and put a piece of cake on the plate, with a lovely silver fork. The plate was then carefully handed to the first person. It was so nice!

The next person in line for cake waited with anticipation for the beautiful cake, plate and fork, and the delivery which was expected to be just like the first piece. To our surprise the elder took from a bag a paper plate, then while holding the paper plate with one hand, took the other hand and grabbed a hand full of cake and plopped it on the paper plate. He got a plastic fork, put it on the paper plate with the cake and shoved it at the next person, and said, “Here!”

We were stunned. I think we all just sat there for a minute with our mouths open.

I feel like the lesson is obvious. At least it was to us. And the question was asked, “How do you share the Gospel?” Are you polite? Do you prepare and is your presentation a lovely and pleasant experience for those you’re sharing it with? Are you rude, or pushy? What about your appearance? Are you clean, well groomed and smell and look nice? Do you leave people with a good and happy taste in their mouth? Is the Gospel truth you share leave them wanting more?

This was such a memorable experience. I have been thoroughly grateful for it. I did then and do now, try to present my testimony and belief of the Gospel of Jesus Christ in a loving and pleasant way. What a great lesson!

Growing Up.

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As a child I wanted to be grown up. I wanted to buy a car, get married, have children, own a home and decorate. It all sounded like fun! And seeing people travel the world, and having fun adventures always looks better on film, or in pictures. We have no idea what went into the planning, the money involved and the energy it took to do their life.

The hardest part about growing up for me has been doing hard things. Responsible things like, working, or giving birth, or making dinner. There is an artist that I love named Mary Engelbreit. She made a calendar years ago with the quote, “Life is Just So Daily” on the front. I’m sure kids don’t get it, but adults do.

Since I have been an adult, I’ve realized our parents and others made it look good. They must have had struggles and challenges, but I was really unaware. I must have been busy being a kid. I heard it said once, “Don’t grow up, it’s a trap!” Hahaha! That’s funny, and true! There are mundane daily things like dishes, laundry and chores, but also some really hard challenges and experiences. You just need to keep going, keep living and plugging along.

I have spent the majority of my adult years very overwhelmed and feeling pretty bad about myself. My expectations of what it would be like and how I would manage were way off. I was very disappointed in myself. Then I learned some great lessons. I learned that life is harder as an adult than I thought it would be. I learned that it’s ok to not have it all together. I learned that for the rest of my life I will be trying to get a grip. And that’s ok. I learned that even in all the challenges of being an adult, there are some major benefits too.

Some of the best blessings and most cherished experiences you can only have with a sweetheart and in a family, as an adult. Getting married and having your best friend as your mate is like a play date. He’s so wonderful, and fun, and sometimes I with I could send him home to “his” house, but we just go to bed and things are better in the morning. To create life with my sweetheart is so wonderful. To see him holding and loving and caring for our kids, and grandkids is such a treasure. To have things and stuff that we have worked for, a home, cars, fun toys, comfortable furniture, and we can’t forget food to enjoy is the best. But most important is the relationships, the family, the time and the love we have experienced in a greater sense than ever before in life.

Growing up is hard, but it is the best!