I recently went to the BYU Women’s Conference. It takes place on the beautiful Brigham Young University Campus in Provo, Utah. It is an annual event. Thousands of women gather on campus to attend classes taught by various amazing people. What a fun time we had. I always enjoy myself, and usually leave with lots of ideas about how I’m going to be amazing too, just like all the presenters.
One person whose talk I really enjoyed was Ruth Todd. She is my age, and very accomplished. She was a news anchor for years and has many other titles to her credit. If you did a “google” search, I’m sure there would be a plethora of information. Anyway, she gave such a great talk. She spoke about how as a child she was a worrier. She dreaded her parents leaving home, and when they did she worried they would not come home. I couldn’t believe she struggled with this. I was the same way when I was young.
Once when I was in junior high my parents were gone on a trip. I always worried when they were gone, but this time was worse than usual. My parents had said they would call on a certain night, I waited and waited. They never called, and I thought for sure they were dead. I had never heard the saying, “No news, is good news.” I just knew that they hadn’t called and I was scared.
So back to Ruth Todd, she said that when she felt this fear she would pray. A feeling of peace always came, and she learned that Heavenly Father answers prayers. What a great lesson to learn at a young age.
When my parents never called that night, I never thought to pray. Can you believe it? It would be the first thing I would do now, but I went through that night alone in my fear. It was a very difficult time. I found out later, that my parents had called, but my older brother talked to them, and never bothered to tell anyone else.
Ok, you will think this is dramatic, but I was scared for years from this experience. I would make my parents call me every night when they left town, and they had to talk to me. I was still scared, but if they were going to go, this is what I needed. I am much better now.
One of my little daycare kids told me today, she is afraid when her parents drop her off that they won’t come back. Wow. What is it that makes a child feel this way? And what can we do to help them feel safe, and confident that things will be ok?
Prayer is huge. If a child knows they are loved by Heavenly Father, that He is there, and that He loves them, and will give them peace, and comfort, that is the most important thing. Also, we need to talk about their fears with them. Somehow, when something is left unsaid, it seems bigger. In my daycare I have one little gal that only comes a few days a week. She has struggled with the separation from her Mama, even though she has a great time when she’s here. But the more she does it, the better she gets at it. Practice makes perfect. Also, I think kids need to know that they can do “hard things”. If they have confidence in themselves, they are more brave.
Once when Flexy was little I was telling him he needed to do better. He said the cutest thing, “Mom, I’m trying really hard at life.” In the end, that’s all any of us can do.
