Category Archives: Family

Birthdays, and Turning 60!

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Me in Kindergarten.

I love birthdays! I love all birthdays! I love sending cards and buying balloons and decorating cakes. I love giving gifts and watching the expression of the person opening the gift. I love celebrating my birthday as well.

I’m always happy I’ve had another year to get smarter and wiser and more appreciative of the blessings and people I am surrounded by. It’s like celebrating the fact that “I’m here!” I made it another trip around the sun! I’m doing my best at life and I love that God gave me a family and friends to help me while I’m here.

I’m sure that birthdays like life are what you make it!

When it’s my birthday I sometimes get worried because of expectations. Will the people I love remember? What is the celebration going to be like? I have learned that in order to not worry, I just tell everyone it’s coming and make a plan for what I want to do. Some of my favorite bdays were spent doing projects and organizing my home and life, but best of all is celebrating with family!

This year I’m turning 60. That is old!! I remember thinking 30 was old when I was a teenager. Now I’m twice as old -as old! I’m so happy to be here. It’s like going on a long trek, or hike. It feels so good that you are finished with the challenge, but you feel really sore. Yes when you get older things ache. I’m not going to die yet, so don’t worry about that, I’m just letting the reality of where I am sink in. I know there are people who run marathons, climb mountains, do iron man competitions at this age. Not me. I’m just moving along “slow and steady” like Alex taught me many years ago.

Waking up this morning I laid there thinking about turning 60, and where I am in life. I felt such an immense feeling of gratitude for the opportunity to live. Life is hard, but life is also such an amazing experience! My blessings and challenges are what has made me who I am.

I was blessed to be born into a family. My parents were and always have been loving, and kind. They have taught me to work, to set goals, to be the kind of person others can count on. Their example has been such a blessing, and I’m so grateful for them. My Daddy has passed on, but I’ve learned, and I believe he is close and still loving me. I know when I feel sad, it’s because I’m thinking about me. I am happy he is resting from his busy and hectic life. I will see him when it’s my time.

I grew up with 3 older brothers, Brian, Brad and Keith. They taught me to be tough. They weren’t always nice, so that taught me empathy. They made mistakes, and that taught me to love unconditionally. Sometimes I felt alone and unloved by them, but I learned to just keep trying to be a good little sister to them. I am a total fan of boys and men because of all my brothers fun and entertaining personalities. I know they know I love them. They have all passed to the other side. I miss them, but I know we’ll see each other again.

I have 2 little brothers. They taught me to have patience and think of others. I hope I wasn’t too mean to them. I was left in charge of them when our parents went on trips, We would go get fast food and eat Frosty’s. As adult they are very talented, and their knowledge and life choices are creative and inspiring. They are such a blessing to me. They are my very dear friends and I love spending time with them.

I am a Family History fan. Knowing where I came from is huge! I feel so blessed to know grandparents, uncles, aunts, cousins and second cousins, etc. I have learned about the life of these people. What kind of sickness or sorrow was part of their existence. Did they have it easy? No, I believe it was harder. I admire and adore them. I believe that because they lived and rose from each challenge that I can too. How great is that? I can do hard things!

All my young life, I wanted to be loved by a sweetheart. A soul mate, and best friend. I wasn’t really sure it would happen, but it did. My Darlin is that sweetheart. I am so grateful for our marriage. My Darlin, is a loving and hard working man. I can count on him and I know he loves me. He has always put our family first. I wouldn’t trade our 36 + years togethers for anything. It hasn’t been perfect, but we’ve learned so much. We have learned how to sacrifice for our children and each other. We have learned what matters most in life and that is love, patience and kindness. We have always included God in our relationship. We pray daily thanking God for each other and asking His blessing upon our marriage. He has blessed us!

I’ve wanted to be a Mama since I played with my baby dolls as a child. I know I am so blessed to be a Mama. I have learned so much about life from my 4 children. They are each unique and amazing. They are all grown up and I feel a little sad about that, but what wonderful adults they have become. When I feel lonesome now and then, I remind myself that the amazing adults they are- is my best hopes and desires for them. We taught them to be responsible, we taught them to love, and share, and do good in the world. They are much better than I could ever imagined!! Because of their great choices they have wonderful sweethearts, too. Oh, do I ever feel so much love and admiration for the humans they grew up to be, and their wonderful choices!

“Grandchildren are your reward for not killing your kids.” I don’t know who said that, but it’s funny. The truth is Grandchildren are such a blessing because you’ve already been through raising your kids. You don’t have to worry about them, because that is their parents job. You get to hug them, and kiss them, and sugar them up, and send them home. They are like the cherry on top! The icing on the cake! Such a wonderful part of life, that’s grandparenthood. Sometimes grandparenthood isn’t what you thought it would be, but that’s ok too. You just do your best in every situation. Just love everyone! (and maybe try not to have expectations) I’m so grateful that my life includes grandkids!

“Make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other is gold.” I haven’t always been a good friend. I have made others feel sad. I have had friends be unkind to me as well. I’ve learned that friendship is a treasure that is worth the effort. I know that friends are part of my life because God knew I needed them. Their example, the acceptance, the experiences we’ve shared. I love them so much!

Knowing about God, and Jesus is such a blessing. I wouldn’t have made it through life without them. I can’t forget the Spirit or Holy Ghost. When times are hard and I am sad. I know because of the peace I feel when I pray that God is aware of me and loves me. He will help me out of some situations and others He will hold my heart while We go through it together. I know He sent me to earth to have experiences and grow. I know he wants me back when I’m done.

I’m glad I’m 60 years old! I’m so blessed. I’m thankful for all of my life experiences the beautiful, wonderful experiences and the challenges. I wouldn’t go back. No regrets. I’m not going that way anyway. Like my “Most Quoted” said, “I’m trying really hard at life!” and I always will.

Mama

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Photo Credit-Larry Hanson

She is a wonderful Mama. She is my friend. I’m grateful she is mine.

These are a few of the things that make my Mom the great gal she is.

She grew up with a Mama and a Daddy and one sister. She learned a lot growing up. Her Daddy was a hard worker, but also an alcoholic. He joined AA when she was 16. She learned respect. Her Mama was a saint, and taught her how to love and be kind. Her sister was spunky and a tease. This taught her patience. She was a good student graduating a year early. She was a good worker, having jobs that were important like a telephone operator. If you don’t know what that is ask someone older than 30.

She is motivated and has gotten a lot accomplished and has done her whole life. She raised 6 kids, then went to college and received a degree in early childhood education. She taught pre-school, Head Start, and an after school program for latch key kids called CARES.

She has been a student of history all her life, having lived for 89 years. She was born during the Depression. She remembers when Pearl Harbor was attacked. Because of her, I love history. She loves teaching even now, she is very wise. A funny thing she says after she’s had an opportunity to teach is, “I’m such a good teacher!” I usually laugh and say, “Yes, you are!” She enjoys teaching too. She teaches Family History Classes, lessons at Church, Group lessons at the place she lives.

She is healthy and comes from good stock, as they say. She once fell down 24 cement stairs and didn’t break any bones. She was 84 years old when this happened. She and my Daddy were in Slovenia traveling and having so much fun with my little brother and his wife, and her parents. What a miracle!

She is very spiritual. She reads her scriptures everyday. She prays and wants to do what God would have her do in life. She doesn’t let the challenges in life bring her down. Some people would call that grounded. Her perspective is always eternal. She lost her sweetheart and love, 2 years ago and doesn’t feel sad all the time. She knows she’ll see him again, and that they will be together forever.

She likes to be by herself. When I was young this bothered me. I wanted her to want to spend time with me. I am the only daughter. I thought we should be shopping or something. At this point in our lives, I’m ok with my Mama not wanting to be with me too much. She’s taught me that to be by myself is a good place. She’s taught me that she is who she is and we don’t always have the same feelings or ideas, and that’s ok too.

Family is very important to her. She loves the ones who came before, and she loves the ones who are living now. She has taught me to love all of these people too. For 30 + years my Mom would have Sunday dinner for the whole family at their home. This was amazing to me. The meal alone is expensive. For many years, my Mom didn’t even have a dish washer. She would hand wash all those dishes Monday morning. We still get together, though not always at her place and not every week. Because she taught me to love my ancestors I have been blessed to know I’ll never alone. They are always there, with their example, their story, their ability to live life even when it was hard. I am connected to them and I love them so much.

Yes, she is a wonderful Mama. She is such a blessing and I’m filled with gratitude to God for blessing me with the perfect parents, and today I’m especially grateful for my sweet Mama!

Grandbabies are Blessings!

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We have been blessed with an adorable granddaughter!

This sweet little “small fry” is our newest granddaughter!

We are so happy and in love with her.
She was born the day after my brother passed away.

It is the truest example of the circle of life. We come, stay for a little while, and then we go. I am so grateful for new life. This sweet little one is our 7th grand baby. She has a smile that fills her whole body!

I love the blessing of being parents, grandparents, and part of a family.

Welcome to the world sweet smiley girl!!

Sorrow

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It seems that sorrow is a big part of life these days. In the middle of the sorrow is incredible joy. In one of the first posts on this blog I talked about the brothers that I’ve been blessed with. If you’d like to read a little more about them click in the search window and type in “brothers”.

I am the only daughter and I have five brothers in the family I grew up in. I have wonderful parents who did a great job raising us to be good people. We are a typical family that has typical challenges. As my older brothers grew up they went down different paths. Each of us chose and our parents never stopped loving all of us or being proud of the amazing humans we became. I watched them choose their path and watched how some of their choices affected their lives, sometimes it was hard to watch. I still think the world of them. I learned so much from them.

My oldest brother Brian was 46 when he passed away, hiking with family on a trail in a nearby canyon. He had a heart attack and died on the trail. We were devastated and so sad to lose our son and brother at such a young age. But the tender mercies and spirit of God told us he is in a good place with loved ones. Free from some of the addictions of a mortal life. My sister-in-law calls death the “Ultimate Rehab.” Truth.

My second oldest brother Brad was 59 when he passed away from cancer. He was a very tender soul whose love for family was immense. To protect his tender soul he had built a wall almost impenetrable by most. He was a very responsible and hard working man. A great provider. I was able to talk to him two days before he was put on a ventilator and tell him I love him. That was a tender mercy. I know he is in a good place with loved ones including our brother Brian.

My wonderful, beloved Father passed away in August 2019. 85 years old, after having lived an amazing life. His passing was not a complete surprise, but nevertheless devastating. I miss him everyday. I will miss him until I get to be with him again. However looking at his life I’m so grateful for him, and for his example of service and love. He was a gentle, kind and loving soul. He was a powerful defender of our Savior and other prophets. His life is his legacy. It is epic. I know he is in a good place and with loved ones including our brothers Brian and Brad.

My third oldest brother Keith, and the one just 1 and 1/2 years older than me just passed away in January. He is my miracle brother. He chose a tough life for a while smoking, drinking, using drugs and missing out on all of the wonderful blessings of being a contributor to this world. After a short stint in jail, he cleaned himself up and came home. He was in his 30’s and back home with Mama and Daddy. Thankfully the judge in his case saw some potential. He changed his life. He quit his bad habits and started a righteous course. One lingering effect of drug use was that he contracted Hepatitis C from sharing needles. His liver was suffering and he needed a new one. Thankfully, because of his life changes he was a candidate for one. In July 2007 he received a donor liver from a wonderful young man who had died in a car crash, Nathan.

Life seemed to be going great minus the usual challenges until a year an a half ago when Keith found a lump in his neck. Cancer was found, surgery and a year spent trying natural remedies. I think we were all scared of the chemo and radiation that our brother Brad had been through. He seemed to be doing fine, for a year then he started having trouble with simple tasks. He couldn’t remember how to do up his pants, or how to use his phone. He had trouble driving. He got a really bad headache one day so his wife took him to the ER. Brain cancer was found. It was aggressive and would be terminal. He had it removed and started treatment…then hospice.

He lost some of the use of his left side, and would call me often to trim his nails. He was always wanting to get back to work. He called me the day before losing consciousness to drive him around looking for real estate opportunities. I would usually just talk him through it and say lets do that tomorrow or next week. Then the call, “Keith is having trouble breathing.” He died the next morning. Tender mercies: he was able to see many family member and was aware they were there and gave hugs to them, most often calling them by name before hugging them. He was optimistic to the end. He tried to get out of bed, I asked him, “Where are you going?” trying to hang onto him so he wouldn’t fall or leave the bed he was attached to and he said,
“I’m going to heaven!” One of his last wishes was to donate his body to science. He had a great love for the donor program. His wish happened shortly after he passed. He is my miracle brother, and I know he is in a good place and with loved ones including my brothers Brian, Brad, and my Daddy.

I have felt so much sorrow this last little while. I have felt peace. I know that Father in Heaven and our Savior are close and aware of our sorrows

From a beloved Hymn,

He answers privately, Reaches my reaching
In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend.
Gentle the peace he finds for my beseeching.
Constant he is and kind, Love without end.

I love my brothers and my Daddy, and I find incredible joy in knowing I will see them again someday.

Families are Forever!

A New Normal.

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A month ago, my normal changed. My daily thoughts, the things I worry about, my sorrow, my tears all became about one thing; my Daddy. He passed away. He has left a giant hole in my life and the lives of our family members. When someone you love is gone from your days, and the time becomes greater since you saw them last, it is sometimes overwhelming, and you just have to stop whatever you’re doing and cry. He is, and always has been, the most wonderful man I know. His life and contribution to this world was significant. He left things, and places, and situations better than he found them. People were always touched by his love and sensitivity to them and their welfare. He worked hard all his life. He served others and made contributions that are still blessing those he loved. He wrote stories and histories and shared them with everyone. He served our country. He loves our Father in Heaven, our Savior, and has a testimony of the Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ. His example is one that I will work the rest of my life to try to emulate.

When I heard the news, I was devastated, but not surprised. He has struggled with a heart wearing out for years. It finally said, “Enough, you’ve done enough.” He was traveling with my little brother, and his wife, and her parents when he passed. I knew that they would be sad, wondering if the trip was too much, but I believe it was a great send off. They traveled up the west coast of the United States, starting at San Fransisco where my parents met, and ended up in Victoria, Canada. While traveling home, they planned to visit my Dad’s older sister, his only living sibling. He passed away at her home. He may have been holding on to see her. My sweet Mama came home without him, and now will be there in their home without him. She is heart broken. Their 64th anniversary was the week after he passed.

The funeral was wonderful. How could it not be? When you celebrate the life of someone like my Dad, it really is a celebration! Many came to pay their respects. Many had stories about how my Daddy had blessed their life, or how much they admired him, or how something he did at the Family History Center was inspired. It was wonderful to hear stories about how great he is to others. And now we just mourn, and try to get used to life without him here.

I really feel that time spent with family is the most important way to spend time. I will miss time spent with my Dad for the rest of my life. I will miss seeing him most every Sunday for dinner. I will miss our monthly dates, and cutting his hair, and trimming his beard. I will miss him calling and my Daddy’s ring tone of Louis Armstrong’s “What a Wonderful World”, playing. When I hear that song, I can’t help thinking about him.

I worry about my sweet Mama. “Is she ok?” “I better call her and check on her.” “I need to take her to lunch.” “What can I do to love her and help her?” These, and more, are all thoughts in my mind several times a day. She’s seems to be doing quite well. Amazingly well.

I am thankful for our strong family bond. I am so thankful that I know that he loves our family and that we love him. We saw him often, and tell each other all the time how much we love each other.

The times I struggle most are when I’m feeling sorry for me. I believe with all my heart that my Daddy is in a better place. He is happy and very busy doing great things and blessing others. Before he passed, he was uncomfortable and frustrated that he couldn’t do what he used to be able to do. He can do anything now. He is at peace and so are we because he lived a great life. His legacy is one of love, service, sacrifice, work, developing talents, faith in God, righteousness, and having fun while he did it all. At the very center of his life was his sweetheart, my Mama, and family. We will all be together in heaven some day.

I love him, and I’m so grateful he is my Daddy.

Reunion Time!

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I have a dear friend named Julie.

She has been my best friend since high school. We have been friends for long enough that we have some pretty troubling and embarrassing stories of our time together. I am amazed we made it though some of them. I’m so thankful we did. She is a gem. So loyal, and generous, and fun!

We have had this friendship and history for years, before we both got married. Then we both got married the same year within a month of each other. Both of our husbands names are Brett. Only her hubby’s only has one “t”. We started having our children within a year of each other. Because we love each other and we like to be with each other, as our children were born, they became friends. The kids don’t quite match up as far as ages go, but each of our kids are very close to each other. We used to call them our chosen cousins.

Let me add here that she has lived 350 miles away from me since just after we both got married. You have to put a big effort in to stay best friends when you live far away from each other. Also, we used to write letters to each other, because it cost too much to call and talk. Now we have cell phones and communicating is easy.

Our children are all adults. Almost all of them are married. Most of the married ones are parents.

We haven’t had all our kids together for years. They are all so busy and when my darlin and I visit them, it’s usually just the two of us.

We told Natasha we were going to visit with our friends and have a reunion. She says, “Now how are we related to them?” Kelsey said, “We’re not.” Natasha said, “What!!! We’re not related to them?” Haha, we laughed and laughed. All this time she thought they were family. Well, they are! We chose them.

So we had a reunion this last week in a little town in central Utah named Marysvale. It is an old mining town. There are lots of trails for riding 4 wheelers and hiking. We had so much fun! All of our kids and their spouses and grandkids where there. Wow! We know how to multiply.

What a fun time we had! It was very crowded, noisy, and fun!

I love our chosen family. And my bestie Julie!

2018 Highlights Pt.2

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August

We attended the 2018 Transplant Games of America in Salt Lake City. My parents look so cute in their shirts. My miracle brother, Keith received a liver transplant from a donor. It is a wonderful gift that made it possible for my brother to still be with us after 11 years.

We had our 33rd anniversary. Spent most of the day with our grandbaby, Willow. We went to Salt Lake City and walked around the Salt Lake Temple where we were married. And ended up in Park City where we had our honeymoon.

We stopped at a place I consider to be very peaceful and relaxing. It is the Glenwood Cemetery in Park City. We spent a little time there after we dropped Willow off to her Mama.

We went out to dinner, talked about the years we’ve been married, and set some goals, then went home.

It was a great day!

September

Our cute grandson started soccer. If you haven’t see 4 years olds play soccer, you need to. They are so cute and fun to watch!

Julian kept insisting the little blonde guy was a girl. He didn’t quite understand why he would have long hair.

My parents celebrated their 63rd anniversary. They are amazing. I’m so happy they’re here with us still and we enjoy our Sundays with them. They love each other more than ever.

November

Our oldest son and his wonderful wife announced that they were expecting a new baby in May of 2019. Yay!!!

Natasha spent the night and had some grandparent time with us. I don’t see her as much as I’d like, but we make the most of the time we have. She is such a wonderful, sweet, girl.

My best friend Lilli took me out to lunch for my bday. She is a gift. I am so blessed to have such a friend. Blog post coming on a future date.

December

We celebrated the Winter Solstice with our good friends Sydney and Chad, and their cute son, Parker, and our families! Dark days are hard, but more light is coming. I struggle a lot with the dark winter days, but knowing that brighter days are coming keeps me focused. Years ago, when I taught Parker in primary, I asked the kids what we celebrate during this time of year. I expected them to say, “Christmas!”. Parker said, “Well, you could celebrate the Winter Solstice.” I have celebrated the Winter Solstice every year since then. By the way Parker is 16 years old, now.

2018 was a great year!

2018 Highlights!

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This past year has basically slipped by and I haven’t shared much. When I look back on the blog there isn’t much. So here is some highlights:

April-

Our oldest, Riley and his sweet wife, Janet and children were sealed for time and all eternity is the temple. What a blessing. To be in the temple with their little family as they were dressed in white making covenants, and knowing the promises of a forever family are real. It is by far one of the most precious and sacred experiences of my life. I love them, and I’m so proud of them!

A future so bright!!!

Families are Forever!

Our “Bonus Baby’s” baby Willow, turned “1”!!! What a sweet little dolly. We have enjoyed having our sweet grand baby in our lives, and we love her so much! Grand parenthood is the best!

May-

Our grandson Julian had a birthday!! This great kid is always keeping us entertained. He does an excellent job communicating what he thinks and asking us about the world. I sometimes have to steal hugs, but he is a very sweet and fun boy. We love him!

June-

Our family vacationed at Lava Hot Springs, Idaho. It was so fun to be together. The family went swimming in the huge swimming pool while I tended a napping grandbaby. We traveled to a ghost town, sort of, Chesterfield is a town that was founded back in the 1800’s. There has been families, descendants of the founders moving back and fixing up some of the old buildings. There was a super cute General Store. Riley and Brett tubed down the river. We hiked up to a metal effigy of Big Foot that was near our camp ground.

The down side? Allergies.

I enjoy being with family more than anything.

Worry, and Sadness.

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I’m so sorry I haven’t written a post for so long. Some people work through their feelings, by sharing them. I usually need time to process.

My dad had a heart valve replaced in February.

I consider myself a faithful person, but I know that even people who are faithful and trust in God still have to experience things that are hard. Things that they don’t want to have to go through. I worried and worried about my dad, and how his life, and our lives might change if the surgery didn’t go well. He made it through the surgery and is doing good. I am so grateful for that. Both of my parents are in their 80’s, so their health and well being is on my mind a lot.

————————————————————————

My brother was diagnosed with cancer in December.

It was a surprise and took it’s toll on my brothers body and was very upsetting and frustrating to our family. What is the diagnosis? What is the prognosis? What is the treatment? Prayers, and fasting, were an ongoing ritual for us. My brother received priesthood blessings and continued to fight, but it was not meant for him to stay.

He passed away on March 15th.

Our family is heart broken. He was such a wonderful soul. Such a hard working good man. He left us way to soon. He was 59 years old. He had so much life left to live, so many things left to do, and so much love to share. We will miss him so much.

I am still so sad. I have a strong testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ, of the Plan of Salvation, but this is the part I don’t like. I don’t like it when we have to be separated by death from those we love. I believe with all my heart that we will be with our brother, son, husband dad, and grandpa, Brad someday again. I will just miss him so much until that day. I am so grateful that part of our Heavenly Father’s plan is that we come to earth as part of a family. I feel so blessed to grow up in the family that my brothers are a part of, with our wonderful parents. They are the ones I was supposed to be with while learning some of my life lesson’s. I will always be thankful for that, but I don’t want to be without them for the rest of my life. Now I have lost two of my brothers.

I am thankful for the opportunity to have this earthly experience. To grow up in a family with wonderful parents. It’s just hard when our family changes because someone has passed on.

“We cannot fully appreciate joyful reunions later without tearful separations now. The only way to take sorrow out of death is to take love out of life.” Russell M Nelson

Gallery Wall!

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I put my cute Darlin to work the other day helping me put together this

wonderful gallery wall! 

I’ve wanted to do this for a while. I love the things we hung on the wall. Most of them belonged to or represent someone, or something that is important in my life.

The octagon shaped framed flower picture, on the top left hung in my parents room in the home I grew up in. My mom said it was her mom’s first. It is unique, and reminded me of my mama and daddy, and now my grandma.

The cute little shelf, is one of three like it that I have. They were my grandpa’s. It used to be  inside the old trolly cars that ran in Salt Lake City many, many years ago. They hung inside the Trolly above the seats upside down from how I have the shelf hung, which would give it a lip or edge to keep the things placed on them from falling off as the trolly traveled around town. I love that it was my grandpa’s, and the story of where it came from.

The clock is newish, but time and how we spend it, is important and it’s my love language. The family plaque is a reminder of what’s most important. The heart represents the incredible love I have for my life, and family. The key is the key to my heart, and represents the priesthood authority that my husband holds, and the authority that seals us together as a family forever. The S is the first letter of our last name, and also stands for, safety, sacred, serene, share, simplify, spiritual, steadfast, strength, strong, sublime, success, and sweet.

A copy of “The Living Christ” and “The Family-A Proclamation to the World” are important and inspirational documents that represent what we believe, and was written by the leaders of our church. A copy of the Bible and The Book of Mormon are laying on the cute little trolly shelf. They are both very important books to our family.  

My darlin and I were married in the Salt Lake Temple which is pictured on the little plaque on the shelf. It was given to us by our son, Riley and his wife, Janet.

And last of all is the sign that says: Happiness is a choice. No matter what is going on in my life, I can choose to be happy.

It’s a good reminder!

And let’s not forget the important picture in the middle. This is our most recent family picture.  Taken in our yard, with my Darlin and I, and some of our grandkids sitting on the bench. The bench that was made out of our old bed frame. Oh, how I love these people!

What a blessing to go through life with them!

I love sitting in the family room and looking at this wall. It is perfect to me!