Category Archives: Lessons

What if you have been judged wrongly?

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I had a situation come up recently. I was judged wrongly. I sincerely try to do my best in every thing I do. Someone thought I wasn’t doing my best. This is a problem, or it can be a problem, only if I let it. I can let it fester and really let it get to me, or I can not even let it bug me. I can feel like people just don’t like me, or understand me. Or I can take this opportunity to become better. Maybe I can improve? Of course I can. Maybe this situation is a gift? One that reminds me to do better and helps me grow! Even if I feel the judgement was wrong, I can do better. I will do better and I will grow. I will choose to be grateful for the opportunity to become a better me. I will feel grateful to those who brought to my attention something to work on. I will receive all things with thankfulness, and love those who might have meant to hurt me. 
I will do it and I will continue to love them. 

Lessons!

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Kelsey, Natasha, G and T at the Air Force Museum 
 T in front of a airplane
“You can do hard things.” 
One of my dear friends, Annette, is the mother to the little boys we used to tend. You may know them by the posts I’ve done about them, “Two Cents” by T and G. I haven’t tended them everyday for some time, but they still come on occasion to visit and play. When T was just little tiny, maybe 4, he had to go to see the dentist for cavities. He couldn’t go to the regular dentist, because he was very scared, and had a hard time doing what the dentist asked him to do. He ended up at the pediatric dentist. In case you don’t know, that’s a dentist who only works on kids. When Annette came to get the boys on the day T had to go to the dentist, he started to cry. I was wondering how Annette was going to get him to go, when he didn’t sound like he would. I’ve never forgotten what she said to him and I learned a great lesson from my friend. She said, “You can do hard things.” Guess what, T still wasn’t very happy about it, but he left with his mom and did it. He went to the dentist. 
Ever since that day, when I’m having a tough time with something I need to do, the thought literally comes to my mind, “You can do hard things.” I can do hard things. We can all do more than we think we can. 

Lessons & Being a Talker

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I have the gift of gab.
 I have always been a talker. In fact, I remember when I was a child, my school teachers telling my mom that I talked too much during class. Since becoming an adult, my ability to talk has been a blessing. My darlin says, “You can talk to anyone, anytime!” I notice people and things, and just start talking. I talk to people in the grocery store check out line, and people at the doctors office. At my job, I talk all day. Most of the time people love it, and talk and visit back with me. It is a blessing to have the gift that I do. Who knew, that the thing that I was always in trouble for as a child would be a gift and blessing as an adult, and that it could also be a frustration to me as well. 
I had an experience at work a few weeks ago. I said something without thinking, and felt very sorry. I didn’t feel very happy about my talking so much then. I wished that I hadn’t said what I said. I didn’t say anything mean about anyone, but I just shared too much about what I was thinking. And what I was thinking was not very nice. I thought to myself, “You say too much!!!! You don’t have to share everything that you are thinking!!” I went home feeling like I was never going to talk again (yeah right, like that’s even possible). I thought about what had happened for a few days. And realized, that I was being harder on myself than anyone else. The situation that I’m telling you about was over, and I was still worrying about it. Then I found a great thought that I want to share. It’s perfect for this. 
The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right time, but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment. -Dorothy Nevill
I learned to be a little more selective about what I say. Think for a moment before I speak, ‘Is this a good thing to share, or is it better to keep it to myself?’

Lessons!

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On July 25th, it was the seventh anniversary of my oldest brother’s passing. He was just 46 years old. Losing him was quite a surprise. We have always been a close family. We had Sunday dinner together for years and years, even after we were all adults, and living away from our parent’s home. We spent time together, hiking and picnicking. He had been divorced and was living on his own. His three kids, lived with their mom. He was always content and happy to be in the mountains. It wasn’t uncommon at all for him to go fishing with his dog, Gordon, at least once a week. He was a happy person most of the time, and mostly fun to be around unless he was teasing me. Yes, he still teased me. He was always ready with a joke or funny story. 
While hiking with several family members, including one of his sons, he just fell on the trail. The family gathered around. Everyone filled with the shock of what had just happened. My nephew, his son, ran down the trail hoping to get a signal on his cell phone. My brothers and dad took turns giving him CPR and carrying him. They made their way down the trail. After the paramedics arrived, everyone realized that what they were hoping didn’t happen, did happen. My brother was gone. His short life was over. My parents were amazingly strong. But as my mom says, “Parents just shouldn’t have to bury their kids.” In the hours after his death, our family started noticing small miracles, tender mercies that the Lord had seen fit to give us during this hard time. The lesson I learned is this. God is always there. Even in the hardest times. We just need to notice Him! When my brother died, he was in the mountains. He was not at home alone, he was with our family doing what he loved, being outside. He was gone in a moment, not after years of pain and sickness. We knew he loved us, and he knew we loved him. He is buried where my mom and dad will be buried, in the same grave with them and not alone. I believe he is with others on the other side. Family who have passed on before him, and love him too. We miss him, but we are thankful that we had 46 years with him. Look for God, He is all around us. He loves us and even let’s us have sad times. These times help us to be better people. 
In memory of my big brother, Brian. Love you!

Lessons: A True Friend!

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Riley and Taz -Dec 1999
It has been 4 days since our sweet Taz passed away. I had an idea that it would be hard when his passing came, but I really didn’t fathom it completely. Taz came to live with us as a puppy back in November of 1999. What a cute little ball of fur. He was mostly black, back then, with white patches here and there. The very first night we had him, I thought for sure he would cry all night. Nope, he hopped right in his bed, and slept till morning. He was potty trained in days and was always ready to greet people who came to visit.
Bear Lake 2008
 When he passed we were visiting friends in St. George. We usually took him with us when we traveled. He loved to ride in the car. He hadn’t been feeling well, and for a second, we thought about leaving him home.
Grandma would come and check on him often,
but he would be by himself.
We took a vote and decided to take him.
After all he is part of our family.
I stayed home from church on Sunday and kept him close, patting him and talking to him. Telling him how much we love him and telling him it will be okay. He was such a sweet dog. He didn’t eat at all on Sunday and drank very little. We had planned to take him to the vet, first thing in the morning. 
2009
I put him in bed, and told him to be a good boy and that I would see him in the morning. The next morning my darlinest got up before me, and went to check on Taz. He was gone. When my darlin’ came in to tell me, we both cried and cried. He said, “I asked Heavenly Father to take him in my prayers last night.” And I said, “Well, I asked Him to help Taz feel better.” We both laughed a little, and my sweetheart said, “Well, He answered both our prayers then. Taz is gone and he is feeling better.”
The lesson is this, when we take a chance and love something or even someone, we know that someday they may/will leave. It won’t hurt when they leave, if we don’t love them so much.  We have loved this little furry friend for almost 11 years. He has been such a blessing in our lives. He has followed me around the house and yard for 11 years. I couldn’t even go to the bathroom without him wanting to come in with me.
2009
He was always the first and sometimes the only one to greet me when I came home. His little tail would wag so hard his whole bottom end would wiggle. I knew I was his whole world. Now that we’re back home, I miss him more than ever.
 He was always here. He would sit by me on the couch. He would somehow get a hold of and chew on my quilts, only later would we discover his expensive chew toys. He would bark when people came to visit. Now the doorbell rings and nothing. ouch!
The thing is, I would never trade all the years of love and happiness with our little friend Taz, for not feeling lonesome and sad for him now. He has been such a blessing in our lives and we wouldn’t trade a second of it.

The Box of Crayons!!!

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I will never forget it!!
I was about 6 years old when I first saw it. I was in love!!! I know, that seems kinda materialistic, but I really loved it and wanted it. Every time I saw it in the store, I would take the box off the shelf, open the lid that folds down inside the top, and just look! All those colors, they were so beautiful. Then I would smell. Mmmmmmmmm! Even weirder, huh? I think my favorite thing of all was the sharpener built-in. Crayons AND a sharpener built-in?
What more could a 6 year
 old ask for?
Well, the thing is, I never asked for them. I thought they were too expensive. I finally told my mom one day, long after I was a grown up. In passing, I said, “Oh yeah, I always wanted that box of Crayola Crayons.” She was surprised!! “Really? Why didn’t you ask  for it?” I told her how I thought they were too expensive, and that I didn’t want to be a burden. It made her feel sad. It was a revelation to her that I wanted something and never asked, and it was a revelation to me that I could have asked.
The lesson is, even if we felt, a little like we went without as children, we survived.
In fact, I would say I flourished and am a better person for it. It doesn’t hurt us to go without. It builds character, gives us empathy, and helps us to understand each other better.
FYI-
I now have a box of
 Crayola Crayons,
a 64 box with a sharpener built in, and I still love them!!!

the joyful nest!

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I don’t know if you remember, but one of my first posts was about “choosing joy”.
It is what I do.
I have come to a time in my life,
when the chicks are mostly grown.
Time flies when you’re having fun, and
I know that in just a few years the nest will be empty.
OUCH!
I feel a pain in my heart. I’m OK, it’s just so hard to have my childers growing up and leaving. What’s weird is, I have been looking forward to this for quite sometime. I just didn’t know it would come quite so quickly. Being a mom has been the greatest, hardest, most amazing experience. When they were tiny, I would give anything (pretty much) for a break. Just 20 minutes! You know, run to the store by myself, take a shower, eat MY food by myself. I think all I did was feel overwhelmed and worry. Come to think of it, I still worry. But now they’re gone alot and doing so much, I worry when they don’t come home at the designated time. Did the car break down? Have they even looked at the clock? These days, I miss having them all safely tucked in bed by 8:30 pm.
After all is said and done, life is wonderful. It is a challange, and I love it. I choose to love it, all of it.
————————————
I sent my oldest son off to boot camp on Tuesday, he has chosen to serve his country. It’s going to be a great thing! I will miss seeing him for a while. Then my second son will be leaving on his mission in July. Oldest daughter is at a crossroads, as well. Bonus baby just turned sixteen on the 19th and had her first date all in the same week. Wow! I  know that I’m still their mom and hopefully they will always come home to the nest for visits, bringing lots of grandbabies and sharing love and  togetherness.
When I first heard Eva Cassidy sing the song, “Who Knows Where The Time Goes” I cried….I sobbed. I thought of my darling children flying away. It’s hard, but when it’s time for them to go, I know it. I have to have faith in them and in God. I know I have taught them, and loved them, and they are amazing!!
I had a friend tell me once, “Joy, you’re not the only one who loves them.” Father in Heaven loves them even more than I do. They will be just fine!!!

Happy, Happy 100th POST!!! 100 WAYS TO CHOOSE JOY!!!

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100 ways to choose JOY!
(in no particular order);)
—————————————————
100-go for a walk
99-cuddle your sweetheart
98-jump on a trampoline
97-research your family tree
96-go for a drive
95-clean a closet
94-serve dinner at a shelter
93-play scrabble
92-cuddle a sleeping baby
91-watch “The Princess Bride”
90-read a good book
89-make a new friend
88-make treats for your neighbor
87-do some ironing
86-take a long hot shower
85-lay on the grass and watch the clouds
84-watch planes take off and land
83- give the dog a bath
82-call an old friend
81-look at your eyes in the mirror
80-go to a museum
79-let go of things you can’t
 do anything about
78-paint your nails
77-make play dough for the kids and play with them
76-sing a song at the top of your lungs
75-do the dishes by hand
74-finish a project
73-practice saying “I love you” to the mirror
72-take a nap
71-start a blog
70-clean out your purse
69-write a letter
68-count your blessings
67-read to a small child
66-braid someone’s hair
65-sit in a park and just watch
64-buy flowers for yourself
63-plan your dream house or your mansion in heaven
62-try cooking something new
61-go for a hike
60-kiss someone you love
59-forgive
58-go on a picnic
57-set some goals
56-write a special memory for your posterity
55-notice the little things
54-plant a tree
53-learn a language
52-sit in the sunshine
51-pray daily
50-have a song in your heart
49-visit a historical sight
48-one word: “chocolate”
47-visit a rest home
46-don’t JUDGE
45-give a massage
44-stand for right
43-believe in God
42-listen to beautiful music
41-play with someone’s hair
40-go for a run
39-balance your checkbook
38-dust your home
37-go to a farm when the baby animals are being born
36-read about great people
35-donate to a charity
33-drink clean water
32-use the toilet
31-“do unto others…”
30-share dinner with friends
29-shampoo, massage your scalp
28-clean up someone else’s mess, without anyone seeing you
27-take pictures
26-get a pedicure
25-“if you can’t say somethin’ nice,
don’t say nothin’ at all”
24-get things done (no moping)
23-have a candlelight dinner
22-start a rock collection
21-HUG
20-listen more
19-count the stars
18-watch ants
17-don’t compare your worst with someone else’s best
16-chew bubble gum and blow bubbles
15-be grateful
14-LOVE
13-feed the birds
12-create something from something else
11-SMILE
10-ride a horse
9-smell brownies
8-Listen to your heart
7-tend children for a tired momma
6-jump a rope
5-lotion your whole body
4-close your eyes and feel the breeze
3-take a class
2-fold laundry
1-Choose it! choose JOY!!!!
Thanks for reading and spending the last 100 posts with me!
 Love, Joy

On death’s door!

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This is Taz
He is the sweetest pooper on the planet. Last Sunday he was not doing too well, in fact, we have been feeling like he might not be around much longer. We feel lucky we still have him. First, he is 10 years old, which is 70 for those of us who know what his real age is. Second, he just doesn’t get that much exercise. Sorry, my top priority is NOT walking the dog. And third, he seems to be ailing a bit lately. So back to last Sunday, he was puken his guts out. I was really starting to feel concerned. We all know the vet is home enjoying his family and maybe doesn’t want to be disturbed, but I was really worried. So I called the vet, (he did put his home phone # in the phone book. Would you put your home phone # in the phone book if you didn’t want to be called on a Sunday?) He met us at his office to take a look.
We’re thinking this is it!!!
We won’t get to have our sweet little Taz anymore. The vet feels around his belly, takes his temp, and basically gives him the once over.
And then annouces that he has “garbage gut”. Garbage gut? Yup, garbage gut! It means he got into the garbage and ate something that was bad. We were back tracking over the last few days, we did leave him in the car while we ran in the store. Maybe he got in the garbage in the van. And we did have a family party on Friday, maybe someone fed him something that’s not agreeing with him. Or, he might have just got in the kitchen garbage after everyone ate pizza. On and on we wondered. What a relief! Thank goodness he’ll make it. We thought he was on death’s door, but he only had garbage gut! He did get his rabies shot. We thought, “We might as well since we are here”. We also got a bottle of antibiotics. He is doing great now, and we will be watching him a lot closer from now on!

Lessons from the Mountain!

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Another lessen learned while climbing this beautiful mountain.
God is in the details!
My husband and I climbed this mountain back in 1999. While climbing we stopped a lot to rest, mostly because of me. My sweetheart is an athlete. While resting we looked at everything; the view, the sky, the cars that looked like little ants cruising around, the rocks, the trees and other plants. One thing that I remember thinking is how much we miss when we don’t stop and look. Everything that was created by God down to the smallest detail is amazing. For example, a pinecone. Have you ever just looked at the intricate details of a pinecone? The leaves on each tree, including the pine needles are so beautiful. Or the flowers. There were all different kinds of wildflowers on the hike, most of them I had never seen or noticed before.
Notice the heart shaped petals on the flower below. That’s Heavenly Father saying, “I love you and I want you to know it!”
The first thought that I always have is, ‘this was no accident, there is a kind and wonderful Father in heaven who loves us!’  He put so much time and attention into the smallest detail of everything He has blessed us with. I think if we all slowed down a little, in our fast paced life and really looked, we would all find God in the details. I know He is real, and that He loves us. He is blessing us all, constantly. Even the hard or challenging things we go through are a blessing if we realize that we learned something new and we’re a better person once the challenge is past. Look for God in your life, He is there. When you notice how He has blessed you, Thank Him.  Love, Joy