Category Archives: Lessons

A little motivation is a good thing.

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Have you ever noticed that sometimes the best motivation for a needed change in our lives is rarely fun or pleasant. When I was tiny (yes, I remember being tiny), about the time I was potty trained, I would go potty in the middle of the night and was either too scared or too tired to go back to bed, so I developed a habit of falling asleep on the rug in front of the sink. Sometimes I slept there the rest of the night. Sometimes I got cold and went back to bed.
When I was five, we moved to a very small farm house in the country while my Daddy was building our new home. Before we could even move into the farm house, a lot of cleaning up had to take place. In fact, the home had basically been abandoned and left empty for quite some time before we moved in. Mom and Dad had 5 kids at the time, and there was only one bedroom in the house. All of us kids slept in the one room. My three older brothers slept in a full bed, and I slept on an old army cot next to the crib where my baby brother slept. Mom and Dad slept on a hide-a-bed in the living room. Sometime in the moving process it was mentioned that there “sure were a lot of mice around”. This, of course, was a concern to me, because I thought they were scary. In the back part of the house was a small wash/storage room. Mom would keep her canning jars there, along with the washer and dryer. The first time I walked back in that room to get something I heard many of the canning jars shaking and rattling. I realized that the mice (not mouse) were running through the jars to escape. Ok, so now we are at the motivation part of the story. I don’t think I ever fell asleep on the rug in front of the sink ever again. I avoided the trip to the bathroom in the night time, all together. I was so good at going potty before bed and staying in bed. I became a parents dream.
I know, I know -he’s darling!!!
Just not in my house!

Lessons from the Mountain!

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You may have read my post  from 10-6-09 about the time me and my darlinest climbed this mountain. Wow, it was an amazing, and hard, experience. I reflect on it from time to time. One lesson I learned was to
 keep a proper perspective. When you’re up high like that, some things down below seem quite insignificant, while others seem amazing, beautiful and very important. You can’t tell from up on top of the mountain that there are any problems in the world. You would think that everything is just moving along. The houses look so nice all lined up next to each other. The things in my life that tend to overwhelm me are not even important. I sensed the reality that we’re all here together just trying to do the best we can.
I once heard an example of perspective from a teacher named Randy Bott. After climbing a mountain, his experience went something like this, while in the valley there were really rough roads, with jigs and jogs, pot holes and bumps. If you were to ride on the road you would wonder why those who made the road did such a lously job. You couldn’t see more than ten feet past the road on either side. But on top of the mountain, he could see why the road jigs or jogs, there was a big boulder or a body of water or something there that couldn’t be seen from the road. He said, “I could see, what I could not see from down on the road.
There was purpose in the jigs and the jogs…it made perfect sense from 1500 feet in the air. And from 1500 feet in the air
you couldn’t see the pot holes“. 
I believe someday we will see our lives like I saw the valley below my beautiful mountain. And like Randy said we won’t see the pot holes. The things in our lives that overwhelm or frustrate us will not be important.  We will understand why the road was bumpy or had jigs and jogs. I am glad, and am thankful when I’m reminded to look at life with the proper perspective.  

What a great dude!!

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This is Alex. He is my 3rd child and the most quoted.
 He is the one who taught me about going “slow and steady”.
Here is the post from May 14th 2009:  “I feel like I have spent the better part of my motherhood very overwhelmed. I know I’m not alone, but it still bugs me. I want to be on top of all my responsibilities, all the time. Talk about unrealistic expectations!!! I learned a great lesson from one of my kids. When my son, Alex, was quite young, maybe six, he taught me the value of patience and perseverance. One day, while going through piles and piles of mail, school papers, bills and various other things that tend to pile up on our kitchen counters, I screamed, “I’m never going to get through all these piles”. To which Alex replied, “Mom, remember ‘Slow & steady wins the race!'” Now, most people know this phrase from The Tortoise and the Hare, the darling children’s book about the race between these two animals. The hare races frantically along, then has to take naps because he is so tired from being frantic (sound familiar?). The tortoise moves along slow and steady. Of course the tortoise wins because he kept an even pace, and didn’t wear himself out trying to be super turtle (or super mom). Ever since that day, I remember what he said and am glad for the lesson. I am much more patient with myself and my life. I am learning to perservere better all the time. Remember….Slow & steady wins the race!”
He is a senior in high school now and is such a blessing in my life. He is the type of kid you can always count on. I am so blessed to be his mom.

A Story of Thanksgiving

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Susanna White was pregnant with her second child when she boarded the Mayflower and left for the new land. Her son Resolved was just 5 years old. She came with her husband William, hoping for religious freedom. They left England on September 9th, 1620 and arrived on November 11th, 1620. After two months on the ocean they anchored off the tip of Cape Cod and Susanna had her baby there. He was named Peregrine, which means wanderer. They then came across the bay to what would be known as Plimouth (Plymouth), Massachusetts. That first winter was very difficult and William died, leaving Susanna a widow with two small children.

The thing that amazes me the most about this story is, how brave these people were. I have trouble leaving home for a trip, I can’t imagine leaving home for good. They really didn’t know what was next. The courage they had, crossing the ocean, then landing in a foreign land with no idea what was going to happen when they arrived, if they arrived, is awe-inspiring. Add on top of that, the fact that Susanna was expecting a child makes me love and admire her more.
In the spring Susanna married Edward Winslow whose wife had passed away that first winter also. It was a blessing that they could have each other to go through life with, after such a tough time. What amazing people they were. That next November was when the “First Thanksgiving” took place, and I’m sure they were thankful to be alive in a new land.
I am most grateful for all of those who made this life better for all of us. Their stories alone bless my life. If they can do what they did, make the sacrifices that they made, go through the trials that they went through, and still come out of it and live a full life, I can too. But it’s not just the stories, it’s that I have the freedom, the rights and privileges that I have, because of others who paved the way for me to have them. I love them!
Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!!!
From this moment on, I want to encourage you to
receive all things with thankfulness and your life will be blessed.

Thank the Lord for the ride!

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“Life is like an old time rail journey … delays, sidetracks, smoke, dust, cinders, and jolts, interspersed only occasionally by beautiful vistas and bursts of speed. The trick is to thank the Lord for the ride!” -Gordon B. Hinckley

When I think about my life, all of it, from the beginning, I can honestly say that I have learned how to do this. Just knowing that there’s a trick is helpful.

One especially hard time in my life was when my son, Riley, was a newborn and I started to have some health problems. When he was two months old, I had to have gall bladder surgery. I honestly felt so picked on. The surgery which was supposed to take a few hours, ended up being more difficult and took about 5 hours. I had a large incision across my abdomen and tubes coming out. I was in the hospital for a week. I was not supposed to lift anything more than ten pounds for a month or so. Guess how much my little boy weighed? More than ten pounds! One of the tubes hanging out of my body had to stay in for 6 weeks. And once a week I would have to go get an x-ray of my bile duct. They would shoot dye into the tube that was hanging out of my body and then take an x-ray. After the first x-ray, they saw something that looked like a gall stone still inside me. If what they saw was a gall stone, they would have to go in through the hole that the tube was coming out of and get it. I was so not in the mood!!! On the day of the last x-ray, I was just praying and hoping that they would not have to go in and get a gall stone. I was very stressed, too stressed. I went out to get in the car to go to the hospital and I sat on a wasp that stung me on the butt. After I realized what happened, I just laughed!!! I was taking myself way too seriously. I went to the hospital and the spot they thought might be a gall stone was still on the x-ray. Like I said, this meant that after pulling the tube out, they would have to put some type of a scoop in the hole and see if they could get the stone. As they gently pulled the tube out, sitting on the top of the tube was the gall stone. It came out with the tube. I immediately thanked Heavenly Father. It was about a year after the surgery that I really started to feel like myself. I had had a baby and two months later had major surgery. It was a very difficult time for me in my life, but I am grateful for it. I am a more compassionate person, more empathatic and aware of others feelings, what they might be going through at a tough time. I have learned to thank God for the ride, then and always. I have also learned to relax when overwhelmed and discouraged and listen for help in dealing with my trials from Father in Heaven.

Miracles

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I’ve always believed in miracles. I know they happen, every second of every day, some where on the planet. We just need to have eyes to see them. Some people would call them a coincidence.
I experienced a miracle. I would like to share it with you. I have always tried to be a good person, doing what I believe is what God would have me do with my life. I really needed a great job, one that could bless my life and help me to supplement our income and pay for much needed family expenditures (ie. a new roof for our house, etc). I recently landed what I thought was this job. I started this job, after leaving a job I really loved that did not have benefits and paid less. The new job was a full time job, insurance, paid vacation, paid holidays and working for an amazing company. Well, not so fast. Two months after I started this job, they had to cut my hours. From full time to two days a week, no benefits. Ouch! I was so sad, and I kept thinking, “what am I supposed to learn from this experience?” I know Heavenly Father is aware of me and loves me and I know He wants to bless me. I decided to just hang in there, go with the flow. I worked a little longer until I decided it was not beneficial for me to be at that job anymore. I had prayed and prayed to know what Father would want me to do.
I was sent home early from work on Wednesday, it was just too slow, and they didn’t have enough work for me. I left my job and went straight to work trying to find a new job. I really felt like it was the right thing to do.
I just kept listening to my heart.
I looked Wednesday and Thursday for jobs, anything really, mostly online and on the phone. I chose to be proactive and knew that God could not bless me unless I was active myself. I really believe that. “Pray like it depends on God, work like it depends on you.” So I decided I would get up on Friday and get ready for work, you know, dress in my work clothes and look professional. I also started calling all my friends and family. Literally just going down the phonebook in my cell phone.
I called one friend who told me about her friend who was an office manager, and told me she didn’t know if they were hiring. I asked her to give me her name and said I’ll just go over there right now (literally) and ask her. What do I have to lose? So I drove straight over to where her friend works. I met her and told her I was looking for a job. She asked about my experience and what I was looking for. I felt like it would be a great job for me. She then informed me that she actually was hiring and that she had a group interview scheduled that afternoon with seven applicants. She was so nice, and I really felt very comfortable with her. She invited others in the office, that I would be working with, in to meet me. They loved me! I honestly could tell, they loved me. I told her as the impromptu interview wrapped up, that I would keep my phone close, so I wouldn’t miss her call. I left feeling very calm and peaceful. I knew that if I got the job, it would be because the job was mine, that I was meant to be there. Later that afternoon the office manager called and said she cancelled the group interview, because she found the girl for the job. It was ME!!!! Later, when I called the friend back who told me about the office manager, she said that her name just popped into her mind and that she hadn’t even thought about this person for a while. When the office manager called my friend to ask about me, she told my friend that she could feel, that I was supposed to work there.
Now, I know some people would say that feelings and faith and such shouldn’t be in the work place. I really don’t make a move in my life without thinking about the big picture, how will this choice effect my life, is this what God wants for me and what He thinks is best?And so far, thinking this way hasn’t lead me astray. Even getting that awesome job in the first place was meant to be. God wanted me to learn something there. And I did. Besides this job wasn’t available back then. I start on Monday and I will do great and love it. Thanks for reading. I love Father in Heaven and know he blesses all of us with miracles. This was a biggy!

I always wondered about that word.

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Remember the wonderful story by Charles Dickens,
“A Christmas Carol“? I’ve always thought it was such a great story. The main character, Ebenezer Scrooge, is very much like all of us, at one time or another in our lives. We get involved in our lives and cynical when things don’t turn out quite the way we expected or hoped. I wondered about his name, Ebenezer, especially when I heard it in one of my favorite songs, “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing”. You can listen to it here. So, being the curious sort of person that I am, I looked it up. This is what I found.
Ebenezer means “Stone of Help.” It was the name of the memorial stone set up by Samuel to celebrate God’s help to Israel in their great battle against the Philistines (1 Samuel 7:7-12)
An ebenezer is a stone, but can also be a pile of stones on the ground.
A really smart person named Christian said “It represents help from God, raising my ebenezer means I am going to ‘praise God’ and mark the spots of His grace toward me as places to REMEMBER! [In the song “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing”,] the song writer is saying to this place in my Christian walk I have come dear Lord, a glorious place, I never thought I would reach on my own, and Lord I did not reach it ON MY OWN, but by YOUR HELP, therefore it is a place worthy of a mark in my mind, in my heart and in my acknowledgement of YOU, as my Gracious God. I think if we wanted to raise an ebenezer today, it would not necessarily have to be a pile of stones, though there would be nothing wrong with that. It could also be a date we remember and celebrated on our calendars, or an extremely highlighted and MARKed, remembered and celebrated place in our diary! “
I love that explanation. Maybe Charles Dickens named his character Ebenezer to represent that Ebenezer Scrooge’s parents were grateful, christian people who wanted to acknowledge God in their lives.
And now that I know what an ebenezer is, I will raise my ebenezer in my life.

Lessons from the Mountain!

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See this mountain…I have been on top of this mountain.
I love this mountain. It represents so much. From the time I was a small child till now, I have looked in awe at it’s majesty.
One lesson I learned from the mountain is this — you can do more than you think you can. We have untapped abilities that are only used when we really push ourselves. My sweetheart and I decided one year for our anniversary to climb the mountain. That was about ten years ago. It was going to be a testimony to our marriage and the work and effort that got us to that point in our marriage. We started at about 8:00 am. We had a great time talking and enjoying each others company. We talked about our kids, our life together so far, our goals and dreams, and of course we talked about how much we loved each other. As the time went on the trail became steeper. There were many switch backs. There were also beautiful views and flowers along the trail. We had not prepared at all for this hike. No walking or special training to build endurance. We just went for it. I remember saying to my darlin, “Do you think I can do it?” and he would say, “YES! you can”. After 7 hours of hiking we reached the top. I was exhausted, and Brett was tired. Remember, we have to get back down. Some where in the middle of the hike I remember thinking, this is probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I had given birth to 4 children and had gall bladder surgery, I was still thinking this is probably the hardest thing I’ve ever done. We hiked down for 5 more hours, using different muscles than we used going up. Toward the end of the hike we both really had to concentrate to put one foot in front of the other. It was more quiet than the hike up, because we were saving our energy for hiking down. Finally we made it. We were so sore, I mean soooo soorree!!! I couldn’t even look at the mountain for months without shedding a few tears. But I did it! I didn’t know I could. Now I know, I CAN do hard things. It takes alot of effort, but I can do what ever I need to or want to do in life. You can too!
(Oh, by the way the hike was 16.o5 miles)

Judge Not!

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While serving my mission in Texas, my companion and I found ourselves at the front door of our ward mission leader. Before we had a chance to knock or ring the doorbell, we heard what we thought was yelling and screaming coming from inside. My companion and I stood there with our mouths open, not knowing what to do. Should we leave? We would obviously be interrupting something. Honestly, the first thought that crossed my mind was…“Is he hurting his children? If he is, he’s not the man I thought he was…Hmmmmm.“ I came to the realization that if I left now, without at least knocking, I may never know what was happening and I would definitely always judge him. I wouldn’t really want to judge him, I just know I would always wonder. So I decided to knock. After knocking, I heard him from inside say, “Don’t open the door. I don’t have my pants on!!” Wow, that’s not what I was thinking would happen. Then his little girl, about 3 years old, came to the window by the door, parted the curtains and just smiled and smiled at us throught the window. My companion and I became more confused as the moments ticked on. His wife finally opened the door with this look on her face like, you will never believe what just happened. We were very interested in knowing what just happened. She told us the story of how as they sat down to dinner her husband was holding the baby (about one year old). As they were eating she noticed something on his leg, and said “Honey, I think you have a piece of meat on your leg”. He looked down to see a scorpion crawling up his leg toward the baby! He handed the baby over to his wife and swiped the scorpion off with his hand. The scorpion then started crawling back up his leg. Of course everyone is screaming. That’s about the time that we, the sister missionaries, got to the front door. As the scorpion crawled back up his leg, he dropped his pants, and killed it with a knife. About that time is when we knocked. It all makes perfect sense when you hear both sides, but to me, the concern and shock I was feeling in the beginning was very real. Can you imagine if I had left and never found out the whole story? I was ready to make a judgement that was very wrong. This was a righteous man, there was no reason to think otherwise. I made a decision that day, that I would not judge a situation like that again until I had all the information. In fact, I make a real effort to judge not!

Texas Bluebonnets

Enjoy "Here" While You’re "Here".

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Time has always been an issue for me. I either don’t feel like I have enough of it or I wish it would go faster. (I know, I know, make up yer mind. ) When the kids were all little it was hectic and out of control. The typical busy life that all moms lead. We went from chaos in the morning: everybody out of bed, breakfast fixins all over the kitchen, then flying out the door to drop the older kids off at school. Then errands, clean house, do a project or two, play and read with the little ones. Then pick up the kids from school, lessons (for us it was gymnastics), then home to fix a healthy and quick dinner. Sometimes more quick than healthy. There was always many things going on in the evenings as well. In fact when I was in the middle of it, I remember thinking, “it will be nice when all the kids are in school, maybe life will slow down alittle. HaHa. I remember hearing older and wiser moms say, “Enjoy it while they’re little, they grow up way too fast!”

About 8 years ago

(my baby is now 15 and my oldest just turned 23)

Then I would usually smile & say “I know, I’ve heard that before.” One thing I have learned in my life is that you can’t go back. I really do miss those children, keep in mind, I still live will all of them. The older version of them. They’re still the same wonderful kids. So now that I’m an older and somewhat wiser mom, this is my advice to young mothers with small children, Enjoy “here” while you’re “here”, cause you can’t enjoy “here” when you’re “there”.
In other words smile and enjoy everyday and love them, hug and kiss them, and don’t worry about the things that just don’t matter. They’re growing every second. I am so thankful to the moms who told me to enjoy them while they’re little. And most of all I’m so grateful I have had the blessing to be a mother. Love, Joy