Category Archives: Life

My Very Own Style, Through the Years.

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My cousin Vickie and Me!

As a Little Girl: Rompers, Calico prints outfit with rick rack around the edge. The things I remember wearing the most was rompers with the straps that tie on your shoulders. Mama made some of my clothes and I loved everything she made. I didn’t know if I was in style or not. I loved flowery patterns and dresses that you can twirl in. I loved white socks that fold at the ankle and black patent leather Mary Jane’s. Getting dressed for church was my favorite.

My three big brothers and me!

As a Teenager: High heels and Bell bottom jeans, HASH, A Smile, and Ditto jeans were the rage. I was lucky enough to own a pair of HASH jeans. One pair and none of the others. I owned one Gunne Sax Dress. It was beautiful and I felt beautiful in it. I wore it to a dance once. Being a teenager and not really having a wardrobe full of the latest styles was a challenge, but I didn’t worry about it too much.

I made this dress for a dance. I loved it!

During my teen years and since I have done quite a bit of sewing. I made many of my clothes in high school and when I prepared for my LDS mission I made a few outfits to take with me. I even sew a few dresses on my mission, borrowing a sewing machine from the ward or branch.

After high school and early married: 501 Jeans. My Sweetie and I for a very short time wore the same size 29″ waist, and could share jeans. After I got pregnant with our first and from then on we both were a bigger size, his not so much, mine definitely bigger. Doing my best to always look my best was my focus.

As a Mama: T-shirts and shorts, stretch or sweat pants. Usually embellished with spit up and baby food. Comfort seemed to be the biggest priority. The kids didn’t care what I wore and we just played and learned together.

As a Grandma: Thrifted Button up shirts and jeans or capris. Most important is the thrift part. I can’t see spending money at a department store when I can buy gently warn nice clothes that I’m saving from the landfill. I love that I can buy a shirt at the thrift store that is long sleeved and make it a short sleeve at just the right length on my arm. I recently bought a dress that had a fabric tie around the waist. The sleeves were a little short for my comfort, so I used the tie to make the sleeves longer and made a tie that just ties in the back and doesn’t go all the way around. It worked perfect. I made it my own. I am very fond of my wardrobe.

I have never been a fashionable dresser, but I have my own style and I like it. I am comfortable and I feel like I look nice.

The United States of America, My Beloved Country

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My Parents Influence was very impactful on the love I have for my beloved United States of America. My Daddy served in the US Army as a young man. They were both born in the Great Depression, making them very humble and grateful for all blessings. They were frugal not being over indulgent in having things, but very careful with what they owned using things up and wearing things out. They didn’t have to throw much away, because they repaired and took good care of their home, cars, clothes, and yard. Many days out of the year an American Flag hung from the front porch. We were taught to love our country and be grateful for all of the abundance living here provides. When jets stationed at the Air Force Base just south of where I grew up, would fly overhead, my Mama would put her hand on her heart a say with an “Awe” in her voice, “Just look at that! That is the sound of Freedom!” My parents taught me that even though things aren’t perfect here in this country, it is the best country on earth. It is the only place on earth where you have the right to choose most anything you might imagine. There are laws, so within the boundary of laws, you can even burn the flag. Most places would never allow that. It breaks my heart when people do it, but I know that because of our beautiful country, if someone wants to they can. We were always taught to share. Sometimes the government tries to get involved in giving to those less fortunate, but it will never be fair, because imperfect people are in charge. We always give a tithe to our church, and donate to various groups to help others. That’s just what you do to love your neighbor. I can’t tell others what to do with their money, but I was taught to share. We have an abundance in this country.

From the very first day I started school we stood as a class and said The Pledge of Allegiance. Picture 25 tiny little kindergarteners with their hands over their heart looking up at the flag and saying: “I Pledge Allegiance to the Flag of The United States of America, and to the Republic for which it stands, One nation under God, Indivisible, with Liberty and Justice for All. ” How wonderful! How perfect to be an ally and true to our country. It’s not a democracy like so many say, it’s a Republic. The dictionary defines a Republic as: a state in which supreme power is held by the people and their elected representatives, and which has an elected or nominated president rather than a monarch. Our beautiful country is ours! It belongs to each of its citizens. And my favorite part is that we are “One Nation Under God.” Our country is founded and originally lead by God fearing, courageous, noble men and women who put God first. They knew they were nothing without God. They prayed at all meetings asking and pleading with God to be with them as they worked out how to build this country . My personal belief is that we were all meant to choose what religion that suites us. If you don’t have a country that believes in a God, an all powerful being, supreme, how can you be allowed to choose what you want to believe. People came because this country would allow that. The founders wanted us all to be undivided, so that choosing faith and God is critical. If we do choose Faith and God, there will be Justice for all, because we will love our neighbor as ourselves. We will want what’s best for us and our neighbor and all citizens.

Well, there are a lot of people who don’t want God involved in their lives in this country. We used to get a ten minute quiet time for meditation or prayer when I was in elementary. Prayer is not very popular right now. Some schools don’t even say the Pledge of Allegiance. Our country is struggling.

When Brett’s parents, Pearce and Nancy were serving a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Boston, we knew we had to visit. It was our once in a lifetime trip. We were able to fly to Boston, where we stayed with the in-laws. We rented a big van and trucked all over with our family of 6 and Pearce and Nancy. This is the list of the places we saw: Fall River, Lexington and Concord, Old North Church, Paul Revere’s Home, New England Aquarium, Plymouth, Plimouth Plantation, Providence and Newport, Rhode Island, New Bedford, New York, Statue of Liberty, Philadelphia, Independence Hall, Liberty Bell, US Mint, Betsy Ross Home, Washington DC, The following Monuments and Memorials; Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Vietnam, Iwo Jima, Vietnam Women’s Memorial, Korean War Veterans Memorial, Marines Memorial, and Lincoln Memorial . We went to The Air and Space Museum, The US History Museum, The Museum of Natural History and then at the end of the trip we walked the Freedom Trail in downtown Boston before we flew home.

I was in so much amazement, awe and respect for this beautiful country. Learning about and seeing so many places that represent our history. We live in a time when some people look down on the founders. I am amazed at all they accomplished. I am grateful for their tenacity and grit. I don’t have any room to judge any of them. I understand a lot of our history and why things happened when and how they happened. I like to believe they did their very best. I feel ashamed of those who judge them. There is a very prideful attitude in our country right now. Very judgmental, and critical of all others. While on our trip I thought about the young founders like George Washington and others, who weren’t really that old, who gave so much time to fight for freedom. I thought about the pilgrims who came over the ocean and did their best to survive the first winter, half of whom died. What did they eat? How did they do it? I know there are some stories that are harsh about them, I think they did the best they could, just like we would. I thought about the beautiful- Statue of Liberty and of the feeling of gratitude those who went through so much coming to live here must have felt to see her. I thought about all of the talking and reasoning that helped the original 13 colonies decide to unite. I felt so much gratitude and love for those who fought and those who died fighting in all of the wars throughout history. I love all of them! I hope they know. We viewed the displays of many of the miraculous events like Space travel, breaking the sound barrier, first flight across the Atlantic. We saw amazing skeletons of animals, the Hope Diamond, meteorite rocks, and I felt so grateful for those who organize all of these things so we can see them. We drove back up to Massachusetts from DC and we were amazed that all of these things we had seen and done were within about 7 hours of each other. We had a magnificent time. We will never for it. I feel so grateful for our nation and it’s history. I’m so happy to know the history, warts and all. I love The United States of America!

I hope it’s clear that even though our beautiful country is not perfect that I will always stand by her. I will always believe in her, and I believe there is Always Hope! I trust our wonderful Heavenly Father the He will bless our country. Even though so many have forgotten about Him, so far He hasn’t forgotten us. I will always be true to God and Country. I am so Grateful for The United States of America.

Moments From the Past

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Thinking about the best moments in my life makes me wish I could return just for a quick visit. I would never want to go back and change things. At this point in my life I can see how the best moments were a gift, and the hard moments were a lesson. With that said, if I could go back for a visit I totally would, only if I could come right back to this moment and not have to repeat all the in-between experiences that brought me to this point.

The first moment that I’d like to go back to was the day I married my best friend, and sweetheart. I remember as a young teenager feeling unsure about myself. I wasn’t sure if I was pretty enough, or skinny enough, or good enough for anyone to love. I was so amazed and blessed when my sweetheart and I found each other. We have been married almost 39 years now. Long before we fell in love we were good friends. I knew him for many years before he asked me out. We were so comfortable with each other I wasn’t sure it was a date. I thought to myself “Are we going as friends?” Well, I decided if he opened the door for me, it was a date. And he did open the door for me. I was so excited to know he wanted to be more than friends. But we’ve always been friends even now. I married my best friend, and my sweetheart. What a wonderful day!

The next moment I would love to return to is really 4 moments. The moments each of our children were born. What a miracle! One minute they’re in and part of you and the next they are their own person; breathing, crying, wiggling, looking around at the world. What a gift that Heavenly Father has given us to become parents. To learn that most special love. I remember the quiet moments, holding them and just looking at them. Wondering if I’ll ever be able to do the parent thing right for them. Then what seemed like too fast they grew up.

I’m so grateful for these wonderful moments in life. Sometimes life feels like a lot. So many challenges, so much fun, experiences that teach us and experiences where we’re the teacher. So many things we hope for, and so many things we hope we never have to go through. We don’t always get to choose. But I think these precious, and beautiful moments are what keeps me going.

Brave

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To be brave is almost the same as courageous. The dictionary describes Brave as; possessing or exhibiting courage or courageous endurance. I don’t know for sure if I’ve ever been really brave. Maybe a little brave. I have done things that were hard, scary and I may have I endured them fairly well. I do believe I did my best.

When I think of Brave people I think of David who killed Goliath. He truly was an example of bravery. His story is one of my favorites. The scripture reads:

1 Samuel 17:20 And David 1-rose up early in the morning, and 2-left the sheep with a keeper, and took, and went, as 3-Jesse had commanded him; and he came to the trench, as the host was going forth to the fight, and shouted for the battle. 21 For Israel and the Philistines had put the battle in array, army against army.

1-He was not lazy, 2- He was responsible, leaving the sheep with a keeper, and 3-Obedient doing what his father had commanded him to do.

Then he finds out that this Philistine had been taunting them for 40 days, saying he would fight any of the soldiers. Goliath was huge, and probably ugly and very intimidating. David is surprised that Israelite Amy is not going up against him. He goes to Saul the King and asks if he can go up against Goliath. Saul says no, you’re too young, you are not a soldier and just a shepherd boy. So David tells the king about all the times he has save the sheep from wolves and bears, killing them and saving the sheep. 35 And 4-I went out after him, and smote him, and 5-delivered it out of his mouth: and when he arose against me, I caught him by his beard, and 6-smote him, and slew him.

David, 4-Was brave and determined to stop the wild beasts from killing the sheep. 5-He saved the sheep right out of the mouth of the beasts. 6-Then he finished the job so the wild animal couldn’t come back after the sheep.

36 Thy servant slew both the lion and the bear: and this uncircumcised Philistine shall be as one of them, seeing he hath defied the armies of the living God.

This is one of my favorite parts, he is using persuasion to convince the king about something the king already knows. The Israelites were the army of the Living God. You cannot go wrong with God on your side. So of course Saul says he can do it. He gives him armor, it’s too big, so David says I will go out without it. So Brave! He chooses 5 smooth stones and heads out to meet Goliath, and says:

46 This day will the Lord adeliver thee into mine hand; and I will smite thee, and take thine head from thee; and I will give the carcases of the host of the Philistines this day unto the fowls of the air, and to the wild beasts of the earth; that all the earth may bknow that there is a God in Israel.

47 And all this assembly shall know that the Lord saveth not with sword and spear: for the abattle is the Lord’s, and he will give you into our hands.

49 And David put his hand in his bag, and took thence a stone, and slang it, and smote the Philistine in his forehead, that the stone sunk into his forehead; and he fell upon his face to the earth.

50 So David prevailed over the Philistine with a sling and with a stone, and smote the Philistine, and slew him; but there was no sword in the hand of David.

51 Therefore David ran, and stood upon the Philistine, and took his sword, and drew it out of the sheath thereof, and slew him, and cut off his head therewith. And when the Philistines saw their champion was dead, they fled.

Wow!! Just, wow! Of course then all the army of the Israelites are cheering and ready to go after the Philistines.

David of course became very well known and eventually became the king. I love this story and David because he is so focused on what is important at each moment in this story. Most important to me is that, he was so brave. He was young, and not a soldier, but he showed all the soldiers what true bravery is like. He knew that His God had protected him at other times in his life and he knew that God can be trusted with what He says He’ll do. He believed and had faith. Faith is a principle of action. When you believe you need to go and do what you know you should and what God commands.

I know others who have been brave. Ancestors who crossed seas and continents to find a special place to live and believe what they knew to be true. I have parents and brothers who went through many challenges in theirs lives with bravery and endurance. I know that being Brave is very important in this world. We know we’re here to learn and grow. Some learning is scary and hard. Sometimes we have experiences that we know are coming and we don’t want to go through, but if our focus and trust in in the Living God, we can be Brave and go through hard things, and come out successful and true at the end.

My Philosophy on Money

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Money is hard for me to wrap my brain around.

I know I need it to live, buy things, and enjoy life, but I don’t always know for sure how I’m going to do all of these things. I just do the best I can and it seems to work.

One reason why I think money is hard for me is because I’m not a number gal. I’m not good at Math, I don’t speak the language, I mean basics yes, but I’ve always struggled with remembering numbers.

Let me share an example; when I go to the store to buy bananas they have a price. The labeled price may be higher or lower than the last time, best price or average price. I would never know the difference. I don’t know how much bananas sell for. If I need bananas, I buy them. I know this sounds weird, like I never shop, but I do. I should know, but I don’t. Even right now I have no idea how much they are and I don’t care. Maybe that’s why I don’t know or pay attention, is because it’s not important to me. Interestingly enough. For years when I would make a trip to the store for some groceries, my total, without adding or counting what I had in the cart was almost always around $70-$75. No kidding! Yes, I bought a lot of the same or similar things but not always. If we needed it, I just bought it and if we didn’t I didn’t. I’m very frugal anyway and always have been. Now my average is more like $100-$120. Still that’s not much compared to what most people spend.

I don’t really like to shop for clothes much. I love to thrift! One of the funnest things about thrifting is the hunt. Looking for a treasure! “One man’s garbage is another man’s (or woman’s) treasure,” is truth. Something about buying a used item, and it’s still usable makes my heart happy.

I would also consider myself very humble as far a my looks go. Honestly I’m just an average looking gal. I went to cosmetology school when I was young, and still have my license, but I don’t spent much on myself. I remember my teachers in school telling us that what we do is enhance or compliment the natural beauty. What that tells me is blue hair, super long nails, and incredibly long and thick eyelashes are not natural. I have are hard time spending money on things that are not necessary, and cost a ton. I know that lots of girls get hair extensions and they can cost thousands of dollars. I know that is not a good thing. I colored my hair for years. Then I didn’t want to pay someone to do it, so I taught my sweety how to do it. He struggle with it a little and I finally thought “Why?” I don’t care about having my hair colored, I’m getting older and I think I should act my age. So I quit. I was only spending about $10-$15 dollars a month on my hair, so I decided to donate $10/month to our churches Humanitarian Fund. It’s not much, but I feel better about that, and I have grown very fond of my gray hair.

As far as going on trips and adventures go, we are very careful about that. We are trying to prepare for retirement, and feel like we don’t want to struggle then. Paying extra on our house, doing some investing, and living frugal will hopefully make retirement happen. But we do have very generous people in our lives who are always blessing us with fun things to do. My best friend is a gem about letting us visit and enjoy fun times with them. My siblings have helped us go on sibling trips by sharing the financial responsibilities. We mostly just do visits with our friends and family close to home.

When the kids were little money was such a challenge, but we paid our tithing and still do, and we have never gone without. We were able to help 3 of kids serves LDS missions, and enjoyed a few trips a year to Bear Lake and Park City. My in-laws had a trailer at Bear Lake and a timeshare at Park City. We had so much fun and spent very little money.

To some up, I’d say my philosophy about money is respect it, what it can do for you, even if you live modestly. Always have a grateful heart. Like I told the kids years ago, not all blessings are financial. We have everything we need and we are very comfortable. We use only what we need, and share with others.

Doctrine and Covenants 78:19 And he who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious; and the things of this earth shall be added unto him, even an hundred fold, yea, more.

God is good. Money is a necessary part of life, but when you careful and always grateful there is always enough!

Growing Up.

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As a child I wanted to be grown up. I wanted to buy a car, get married, have children, own a home and decorate. It all sounded like fun! And seeing people travel the world, and having fun adventures always looks better on film, or in pictures. We have no idea what went into the planning, the money involved and the energy it took to do their life.

The hardest part about growing up for me has been doing hard things. Responsible things like, working, or giving birth, or making dinner. There is an artist that I love named Mary Engelbreit. She made a calendar years ago with the quote, “Life is Just So Daily” on the front. I’m sure kids don’t get it, but adults do.

Since I have been an adult, I’ve realized our parents and others made it look good. They must have had struggles and challenges, but I was really unaware. I must have been busy being a kid. I heard it said once, “Don’t grow up, it’s a trap!” Hahaha! That’s funny, and true! There are mundane daily things like dishes, laundry and chores, but also some really hard challenges and experiences. You just need to keep going, keep living and plugging along.

I have spent the majority of my adult years very overwhelmed and feeling pretty bad about myself. My expectations of what it would be like and how I would manage were way off. I was very disappointed in myself. Then I learned some great lessons. I learned that life is harder as an adult than I thought it would be. I learned that it’s ok to not have it all together. I learned that for the rest of my life I will be trying to get a grip. And that’s ok. I learned that even in all the challenges of being an adult, there are some major benefits too.

Some of the best blessings and most cherished experiences you can only have with a sweetheart and in a family, as an adult. Getting married and having your best friend as your mate is like a play date. He’s so wonderful, and fun, and sometimes I with I could send him home to “his” house, but we just go to bed and things are better in the morning. To create life with my sweetheart is so wonderful. To see him holding and loving and caring for our kids, and grandkids is such a treasure. To have things and stuff that we have worked for, a home, cars, fun toys, comfortable furniture, and we can’t forget food to enjoy is the best. But most important is the relationships, the family, the time and the love we have experienced in a greater sense than ever before in life.

Growing up is hard, but it is the best!

Favorite Books

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As a small child a fun thing that would happen about once a month or so, down by the church we attended would be parked a big motorhome/bus looking vehicle. It was called the Bookmobile. To see it parked there would be such a happy thrill. I loved the Bookmobile. I had various books for different ages and by different authors. It had a special smell and all the books looked wonderful lined up waiting to be read.

I loved the picture books before I was very proficient at reading. One of my favorites is a book called The Little House by Virginia Lee Burton. It’s a story about a precious little cottage that is built on a hill out in the country. There is a brook nearby and fruit trees with swing hanging from them. Smoke is coming from the chimney in the cold months and in the warm months the mother in the home hangs clothes to dry in the yard. There is even a little pond for swimming just down the hill from the house. At first the family comes and goes in a horse drawn carriage, but soon there are cars, and tractors and machinery that makes it way to the little house. The little house is curious about the city, but is concerned as other houses rise up around, and soon the little house is surrounded by a large city. The buildings are very tall on either side of the little house and the sun is blocked, so no one wants to live in the little house. The city kept getting bigger and bigger. Trollies and cars and busy people constantly moving and the little house missed the country. Then one day the great great granddaughter of the man who built the little house came and moved the little house back out to the country. The great great granddaughter found just the right spot and the little house was so happy and never wondered about the city again.

I love that story! The cute little house and yard and country location are just what I’d always wanted to live in.

The next favorite book that I love is The Secret Garden by Francis Hodgson Burnett. An orphan goes to live with her uncle. He is very sad and lonely. She is very sad too. She finds a secret garden near the uncles home and asks him if she can use a bit of land to plant things. She meets a new friend, Dickon, who is the younger brother to the chambermaid Martha. She finds out shortly after she gets to her uncles house that she has a cousin, Colin. He is very sickly and his existence is all about crying and being taken care of. Well, Mary the orphan and cousin is not putting up with him. She helps him to realize he’s not sick and encourages him to do more. He starts to do better, and Mary, Colin and Dickon spend hours in the garden. This is another example of something I always wanted to do. Work the land and make my patch of earth very beautiful with flowers, vegetables, shrubs and trees. I love to be in nature.

The next favorite story that I love is one that I read as an adult. It is a classic. It’s called: Great Expectations by Charles Dickens. My Mama read to us kids from this book when I was young. I remember being kind of concerned about the lady Miss Havisham, who still wears her wedding dress and that the wedding cake and flowers are covered in cobwebs. It was always there in the back of my mind growing up and then I finally decided it was time to read it. It’s not an easy book, even though the reading level for this book is considered to be grade 9, and the genre is young adult. The book is over 100 years old and many of the words are not in use anymore. This does make it a challenging book to read. I must say even though it was tough for me, I thoroughly enjoyed the book, the story and the characters. The main hero of the book is Pip. His full name is Philip Pirrip, but goes by Pip. He is a very poor orphan who is being raised by his oldest sister. She is unkind to him, but her husband Joe is a good man and treats Pip kindly. Pip runs into an escaped convict, Magwitch who asks Pip to bring a file so he can cut his chains off. Pip brings the file to him and also food.

This kindness touches the convict who later becomes a very important part of the story.

Pip is asked by Miss Havisham to visit and he spends time with her adopted daughter Estella. The two children play games and Pip developes an affection for Estella while she acts aloof and disinterested.

Much later Pip is given an opportunity to go to London and become a “Gentleman”. Pip doesn’t know who his benefactor is, but he suspects it is Miss Havisham. There are many twists and turns and Pip finally finds out who is supporting him. He learns some very hard lessons about what is most important. He learns that sometimes the ones we judge or look down on turn out to be the best people after all.

I’ve always considered expectations to be one of the most difficult things in life. It’s something we all do. We have some plan for our future, we have expectations, but very seldom does life turn out exactly like we think or expect. As a young woman my hope was to marry and become a Mama. That was my dream. My expectation was that I would be able to be a homemaker and care for my children without working a job outside the home. Reality, my dream came true, I am married and a Mama. I’m so thankful for that blessing. My expectation did not happen the way I hoped. It has been necessary for me to work in some way or another to help provide for our little family. Was I disappointed? Yes, but I also found creative ways to work, like doing daycare so I was home and bringing in income.

So is it better to not have expectations? If we don’t make plans or expect certain things to go a certain way, will we move forward toward our goals or what we want? Or what if there is an event that you’re planning, you need to plan. How many people do you expect? And the planning continues; I want people to come, what if they don’t? I want it to be fun, what if someone gets upset? (Like last time). I better be prepared or expect there could be problems. Another example: When I’m a grandma, it will be like this or that. Then when you become a grandma you realize you’re not in charge. How you expected it to be is not how it is. I’m still learning this at 61 years old. It seems to be better to just enjoy life. Do your best in whatever life gives you. Be careful with expectations, for Pip and me they don’t always turn out how you thought they would, but they turn out wonderful. It is best to enjoy life, and be thankful in all things. Great Expectations are a lesson in life.

Music

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I am not a huge music follower, but I love music. I forget to listen! I love it when I hear it, but I don’t need it going all the time. I enjoy pop or at least the “pop music from the 60’s, 70’s, 80’s, and more” as the radio station used to say. When a song comes on the radio or I hear it in a store somewhere, I find myself humming or softly singing a long.

The very first song I remember liking as a kid was a song called Sugar, by The Archie’s that came out in 1969. We danced to it in the 5th grade. I loved it, and it takes me back in time. I loved the sound the dancing and the boys that we danced with.

Then there was a song called Brandy by Looking Glass that me and my friend Julie used to sing together.

Sometimes a song would be popular and be heard at the time of a significant event and that song forever reminds you of that event. When a family friend died, Midnight at the oasis by Maria Muldaur played in the car on the way to the funeral.

Pretty much any Dan Fogelberg, Billy Joel, Elton John, Jackson 5, Blondie, Cindy Lauper, Eagles, or Chicago songs remind me of high school. Although a lot of the songs I liked were one hit wonders for some bands, so I won’t mention them. Anything that would play on the pop radio station back in the late 1970’s and early 1980’s was my favorite. I didn’t have the ease of listening to music that I liked -like the kids do now. Just what the radio played and occasionally what I bought, but it was a cassette tape then.

The song Jessie’s Girl by Rick Springfield used to be a favorite between me and my friend Julie. We’d sing at the top of our lungs playing our air guitars, and then play it again. So much fun!

Since the late 1980’s I was introduced to Yanni. My little brother would play his music at the house I grew up in while we were there on Sunday’s for dinner. I loved it from the start. No vocals just instrumental. Yanni is from Greece and has a very unique sound to his music, but it just touched me and I love it. I used to blast Yanni on Saturday mornings so the kids could enjoy it while we got our Saturday chores done. I have seen him in concert at least 3 times. I really don’t do concerts so that is more that anyone else. I love Yanni.

Since I’ve gotten older and have struggled more with depression I have come to love Paul Cardall. Instrumental again. Very soothing and calming. I love instrumental hymns and piano music. The older I get the less I like drums, loud noises and scream singing. In fact most of the time that I’m in the car driving, it’s either silent or I’m listening to a podcast.

Isn’t it interesting how we change as we grow older?

We’re All Influencers

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I had a conversation with my daughter Kelsey the other day about “Influencers” on social media. As we talked about how they seem to be quite confident in what they share and seem to believe. Some of the influencers are members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, the same church we belong to. These are good people, and they sometimes have a large following, but they’re views and what they do is not always the view of the church, exactly. They sometimes don’t follow all the teachings, completely. Some are even upset about something the church or its leaders have said, and they share that on their platform. I’m a believer in agency and the freedom to choose. I know others don’t always agree with what the church teaches, but when my daughter and I talked, we both agreed the best place to learn about The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is from an official representative, missionaries, leaders, and those who are called to share the true gospel teachings. If you got your feelings hurt, or an older mentor told you something and it’s not correct, you shouldn’t be sharing that information if it’s not true. That being said, you can’t change others.

The 6th question in the temple recommend interview is this:

  1. Do you follow the teachings of the Church of Jesus Christ in your private and public behavior with members of your family and others?

Russell M Nelson said, “Individual worthiness requires a total conversion of mind and heart to be more like the Lord.”

Are you an example? What about an Influencer? Influencer: one who exerts influence : a person who inspires or guides the actions of others.

Aren’t we all- Influencers? Whether we influence others to do what’s right or not.  

I want to tell you about two of the most Christlike influencers I know: My parents. My Daddy was not a member of the church until he was a 20 year old in the army, stationed at the Presidio in San Francisco. He joined the church, because he was influenced by another soldier who was a member and who gave him a copy of the Book of Mormon. My Mama grew up a member of the church in Salt Lake City, and was on an adventure working and living with girlfriends in San Francisco.  They met at church and shortly after fell in love. 

After marriage they moved to Utah. All the while living the gospel, and being amazing. They raised a big family by today’s standards, 6 kids. Five boys and one girl. That’s me. 

All parents know that the job is tough. We do our best, but we’re not perfect. My three older brothers struggled living what my parents taught, but were never left out or not included. The influence and love my parents showed was beautiful, and consistent.

I want to tell you about one brother, Keith. He was an alcoholic, a smoker, and a drug addict for most of his adult (young) life. He was finally jailed for a DUI, and would call my parents often begging through tears for them to come get him, all while the parent not talking to him would help the one talking to him be strong. “You need to be there”, they’d say. He was there for 5-6 months. While waiting for the court date, Dad wrote a letter to the judge asking to please be lenient with his ruling and let Keith be released with time served and come home. He could have gone to prison. Thankfully, he was released with an ankle bracelet and allowed to come home to my wonderful parents’ influence and love. FYI there isn’t alcohol, cigarettes or drugs at the county jail. He was clean the day he was released. Maybe seeing his life for the first time since his teen years, sober. The pull of my parents’ love would prove to be greater than the pull of his previous lifestyle. He was able to stay sober and became completely active in the church. He married in the temple, and served in whatever calling he was given. Guess what? He became a righteous influencer to all who knew his previous life. He became a positive influencer because my parents were a positive influence to him. One remaining challenge from using needles with drugs, he had contracted Hep C. His liver began to fail. We were so worried and sad. He had just cleaned up his life! But we all prayed for a miracle. It happened and through a very generous donation Keith received a liver from a donor who had died in a car crash. 

My parents provided Sunday Dinner every week for most of our adult lives for all the extended family. All were invited and most of the time everyone would come. On occasion my kids would  see one of my older brothers smoking out in front of the house. They knew it wasn’t a good thing, and they’d come tell me in a very worried voice. I’d say, “yes your uncle smokes, but that’s not who he is. We love him no matter what he does.” 

My parents went through so much worry with kids whose choices were not what they wanted for them, but their love for them was always greater.  

Even if we understand the idea that we should love people, we sometimes think we’re supposed to love them back onto our path instead of respecting their own journey. I’m not trying to love people into coming with me. I’m just loving people. No expectations, no transaction. They and God will figure out their journey; my job is to love them along the way. -Steve Young

Now, back to my brother Keith. He did great for a while, loving and serving and blessing lots of people, and living as a follower of Christ. He found out that he had throat cancer in 2019, then glioblastoma (brain cancer) in 2020, and passed away in January of 2021.  

I have lost all three of my older brothers, now. They all died young. Their choices and lifestyles quite possibly could have played a part in that. But they always knew they were loved and could receive help at any time from Mom and Dad. The lesson is this. Our job is not to judge. Our job is not to choose for another. Our job is to live the gospel of Jesus Christ in our homes and in our community and in the world. We are all influencers. Living the gospel is the right thing to do, and being a righteous influencer as a result of it is wonderful. I want my legacy to be that I loved everyone, and that I was an example of a believer. When you love, it doesn’t mean you agree, it means you honor their right to choose for themselves. It means we love our non-member or inactive neighbor. It means we continue in faith even when the world is in turmoil.

2 Nephi 31:19 …after ye have gotten into this strait and narrow apath, I would ask if all is bdone? 

20 Wherefore, ye must press forward with a asteadfastness in Christ, having a perfect brightness of bhope, and a clove of God and of all men. Wherefore, if ye shall press forward, feasting upon the word of Christ, and dendure to the end, behold, thus saith the Father: Ye shall have eeternal life.  

Jesus said, “Love everyone, treat them kindly too. When your heart is filled with love… (you’ll feel good and true.)” I’m so thankful for the most wonderful influencers in my life, my parents. For their example and influence that has blessed me with the desire to “follow the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ in my private and public behavior, with family and others.“

A Little Quirky

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We’re all human beings, and are mostly the same. Made in the image of God. We have eyes, ears, arms, legs, hair, mouths, etc. Because of DNA we all have familiar traits. Many times in life you can tell people from the same family because the look very similar.

In the family I grew up in we have funny little pinky toes. They’re short and bend toward the big toe, over the toe next to it. It is very obvious in most of us kids. My dad and all the brothers except two have what my dad calls fringe. Bald on top with hair on the sides and back. There’s an old wives tale that says the men/sons go bald if the mother’s father is bald. My Mama’s dad had a full head of hair when he died. So I don’t think that’s true.

In our family, we have two girls and two boys. We hear from many people that our girls look exactly like each other. Some people can’t tell them apart. That is a surprise to me, because I don’t think they look alike much at all. The boys are very different Riley has dark brown hair, and Alex has blonde hair, although the older he gets the darker his hair has gotten. People have said they look alike. Really?

One of the things I would say is a trait that has carried down to our kids, and grandkids is curly hair. Not everyone has it, but some do and I did and do. My maternal grandma and my Mama both had wavy/curly hair. I have always had curly hair. Riley has curly hair. His kids have curly hair. Although his sweet wife Janet has curly hair too. So they get it from both parents. Emily, our Bonus Baby has a sweet little one with really curly hair.

Joy
Grandbaby Monroe

One other physical trait that I think I have from my grandma is short and fluffy. I may not be super fond of the fluffy part, but I have learned to love me, all of me, and I do.

I think physical traits that repeat through the generations are neat! It is one of the many things that bonds us to each other even if they’re a little quirky.

We’re made in the image of God and each other.