We have been blessed with an adorable granddaughter!
We are so happy and in love with her.
She was born the day after my brother passed away.
It is the truest example of the circle of life. We come, stay for a little while, and then we go. I am so grateful for new life. This sweet little one is our 7th grand baby. She has a smile that fills her whole body!
I love the blessing of being parents, grandparents, and part of a family.
Welcome to the world sweet smiley girl!!
It seems that sorrow is a big part of life these days. In the middle of the sorrow is incredible joy. In one of the first posts on this blog I talked about the brothers that I’ve been blessed with. If you’d like to read a little more about them click in the search window and type in “brothers”.
I am the only daughter and I have five brothers in the family I grew up in. I have wonderful parents who did a great job raising us to be good people. We are a typical family that has typical challenges. As my older brothers grew up they went down different paths. Each of us chose and our parents never stopped loving all of us or being proud of the amazing humans we became. I watched them choose their path and watched how some of their choices affected their lives, sometimes it was hard to watch. I still think the world of them. I learned so much from them.
My oldest brother Brian was 46 when he passed away, hiking with family on a trail in a nearby canyon. He had a heart attack and died on the trail. We were devastated and so sad to lose our son and brother at such a young age. But the tender mercies and spirit of God told us he is in a good place with loved ones. Free from some of the addictions of a mortal life. My sister-in-law calls death the “Ultimate Rehab.” Truth.
My second oldest brother Brad was 59 when he passed away from cancer. He was a very tender soul whose love for family was immense. To protect his tender soul he had built a wall almost impenetrable by most. He was a very responsible and hard working man. A great provider. I was able to talk to him two days before he was put on a ventilator and tell him I love him. That was a tender mercy. I know he is in a good place with loved ones including our brother Brian.
My wonderful, beloved Father passed away in August 2019. 85 years old, after having lived an amazing life. His passing was not a complete surprise, but nevertheless devastating. I miss him everyday. I will miss him until I get to be with him again. However looking at his life I’m so grateful for him, and for his example of service and love. He was a gentle, kind and loving soul. He was a powerful defender of our Savior and other prophets. His life is his legacy. It is epic. I know he is in a good place and with loved ones including our brothers Brian and Brad.
My third oldest brother Keith, and the one just 1 and 1/2 years older than me just passed away in January. He is my miracle brother. He chose a tough life for a while smoking, drinking, using drugs and missing out on all of the wonderful blessings of being a contributor to this world. After a short stint in jail, he cleaned himself up and came home. He was in his 30’s and back home with Mama and Daddy. Thankfully the judge in his case saw some potential. He changed his life. He quit his bad habits and started a righteous course. One lingering effect of drug use was that he contracted Hepatitis C from sharing needles. His liver was suffering and he needed a new one. Thankfully, because of his life changes he was a candidate for one. In July 2007 he received a donor liver from a wonderful young man who had died in a car crash, Nathan.
Life seemed to be going great minus the usual challenges until a year an a half ago when Keith found a lump in his neck. Cancer was found, surgery and a year spent trying natural remedies. I think we were all scared of the chemo and radiation that our brother Brad had been through. He seemed to be doing fine, for a year then he started having trouble with simple tasks. He couldn’t remember how to do up his pants, or how to use his phone. He had trouble driving. He got a really bad headache one day so his wife took him to the ER. Brain cancer was found. It was aggressive and would be terminal. He had it removed and started treatment…then hospice.
He lost some of the use of his left side, and would call me often to trim his nails. He was always wanting to get back to work. He called me the day before losing consciousness to drive him around looking for real estate opportunities. I would usually just talk him through it and say lets do that tomorrow or next week. Then the call, “Keith is having trouble breathing.” He died the next morning. Tender mercies: he was able to see many family member and was aware they were there and gave hugs to them, most often calling them by name before hugging them. He was optimistic to the end. He tried to get out of bed, I asked him, “Where are you going?” trying to hang onto him so he wouldn’t fall or leave the bed he was attached to and he said,
“I’m going to heaven!” One of his last wishes was to donate his body to science. He had a great love for the donor program. His wish happened shortly after he passed. He is my miracle brother, and I know he is in a good place and with loved ones including my brothers Brian, Brad, and my Daddy.
I have felt so much sorrow this last little while. I have felt peace. I know that Father in Heaven and our Savior are close and aware of our sorrows
From a beloved Hymn,
He answers privately, Reaches my reaching
In my Gethsemane, Savior and Friend.
Gentle the peace he finds for my beseeching.
Constant he is and kind, Love without end.
I love my brothers and my Daddy, and I find incredible joy in knowing I will see them again someday.
Families are Forever!
This last year had a lot of challenges, but one really sweet and wonderful blessing was getting a new grandbaby boy!!
Our “Most Quoted” Alex and his sweet wife Amber became parents to this adorable little guy in August. He is such a blessing to our family and I’m so grateful he is here.
It’s been a tough year in our world.
I’m sure you know.
I have to put an extra amount of effort in to just getting through the day sometimes. The world feels like it is in chaos. So much going on, but it all started for me with Covid-19. This virus has been making its way around the world causing death and heartache. Covid-19 stands for “Co” Corona, “Vi” Virus, and “D” disease. 19 is the year the virus came out. I don’t like that. So-
Aren’t acronyms great?
Looking at the acronym which holds so many negative and frustrating feelings, I made a choice to change what COVID-19 means to me. It doesn’t make it go away, or change the things associated with it, but it helps me focus on what “I” can do. I get to choose how I feel and what I’m going to do inside with the worry, sadness, frustration, and anger I feel about this year. So here is what COVID-19 means to me…
Choose Optimism & Valor In Distress 19
19 is a prime number- only divisible by the number 1 and itself.
Number one is God in my life. “I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” Philippians 4:13. I know God is very aware of what is going on right now. I know He’s OK with us having hard things happen sometimes. We need it. It reminds us what’s most important in life. It’s not stuff, or popularity. It’s not running around busy, busy, busy. It helps us grow in ways He wants us to grow.
What can I do?
I have been reminded and I am grateful for the reminder to slow down, spend time on loving my family and loving myself. When I think that 19 is prime, only divisible with “1” which I will focus on as God, and “itself”, that’s me. What can I do? And I decided to set 19 goals to accomplish this year and on, depending on when the goals are accomplished and when the virus is gone.
1-Slow down-Stop, sit still, think. What is God telling me about my life. What is my body trying to tell me. Am I listening to my intuition or the spirit tell me how best to go forward. There is a peace that comes with feeling connected to a higher power. He knows everything, I know not much. I love being lead. I feel calm when I think of Heavenly Father and my Savior. I feel their love and peace. Slowing down is very helpful.
2-Be grateful-Always look for the blessings in life. It is amazing how many tiny insignificant things I see, feel, or notice on a daily basis that lets me know there is order in the chaos. I have a gratitude journal, it is super helpful as a reminder to be grateful.
3-Spend time with my spouse, reminding each other what we love about each other-Busyness is one of the enemies of a great marriage. You really need to make time for each other and work on loving each other. Ask yourself, “Why did I marry him/her?” and appreciate those things again. Look for growth and service. My sweetie has served me in many ways through the years and I love him for it. We need to laugh and have fun with each other. Since we live in the same house and the virus can’t stop us from being together, we have had a lot of time to laugh and love each other.
4-Reading my scriptures everyday-I have been reading for my whole life, and I never get tired of it. There is always something new to learn. I love that about the scriptures.
5-Having meaningful church at home-We’re still working on the meaningful. I love Zooming sacrament meeting in my PJ’s. That’s something I never thought I’d be able to do. I would miss it, if it weren’t for Zoom. Thank you, Zoom people.
6-Organizing our home-Cleaning out closets, organizing memorabilia. I refer to this as, “Getting a grip.” Still working on it.
7-Going through old pictures-What a fun activity!! Looking through pictures of our sweet children when they were little, and sharing fun old pictures with each other through text.
8-Writing notes and letters to loved ones-I love getting letters. I try to write notes to those I love and let them know I love and appreciate them.
9-Donating to charities-After I go through the closets and realize I don’t need all this stuff, I make an appointment and donate it.
10-Gathering in a careful way-this is easier in the summer, or warmer weather. We can still space out and wear masks, like meeting at the park. Everywhere we’ve gone for a drive or to get away form the usual this year, has been packed with people, canyons, lakes, Spiral Jetty’s. I think we’re all thinking the same thing, get out in nature and gather carefully.
11-Family History-Oh, how I love my ancestors! I need to spend more time on them. I love the technology that allows me to do family history from home. I love learning and knowing about their lives and what they went through. It helps me to be grateful and know that I can do hard things, too.
12-Scrapbooks-These will always be necessary in my life. I love keeping a record of what we’re doing each year, and remembering events that mean so much in our lives. I’ll always do this!
13-Deep clean our house-Still doing this, but its definitely a source of feeling good.
14-Movie marathons, games, and laughing-Harry Potter, Scrabble, and others. Good times. There is something about watching a whole series or all the seasons from a show or movie that is satisfying. Great fun!
15-Build a greenhouse with my Darlin-I’ve always wanted a greenhouse. Me and my Darlin worked on this beautiful greenhouse all summer long. Many hours of love and creativity went into building this “She-shed”! My Darlin loves me!
16-Help my Mama-shopping for her, or with her if it’s not crowded, and sharing lunch together, listening and sharing what is going on in both of our lives since Daddy passed away.
17-Simplify-What matters most. What is the best thing/s I can do with today? It makes a difference to really think about my time.
18-Be productive everyday-I struggle when I’m sad/overwhelmed/super bummed. It is all I can do to get a shower and do the dishes, somedays. I do my best and that is enough.
19–Choose optimism & valor in distress! I love that even though I struggle with depression, I still have a desire to be happy, and productive. I push myself to do it, and am always glad I did.
I hope that the way I have chosen to look at COVID-19 is a help to you too.
We can do it!
These are my maternal grandparents. What were their experiences in life? Were they ever worried? They look so young, but they had a lot of weight on their shoulders. Married during the depression, teenage parents, finding their way through life with hope and love. They were married for 49 years. Grandpa was a hard worker, always. He was an amateur boxer, very athletic, then had a stroke at 59. He was paralyzed on his right side for the rest of his life. He died at 79 years old, twenty years after his stoke. Grandma was such a sweetheart. She was always helping Grandpa with all of his daily routines. She loved to watch Lawrence Welk, and go for rides in the car, and have picnics. She got cancer and died at 66. I love them. When life is hard, I remind myself that life has always had challenges. It is the reason we’re here, to learn and grow. To love each other and help each other. When I think about my ancestors and their lives, I know I can do hard things. Life is a gift. Love is the most important.
A month ago, my normal changed. My daily thoughts, the things I worry about, my sorrow, my tears all became about one thing; my Daddy. He passed away. He has left a giant hole in my life and the lives of our family members. When someone you love is gone from your days, and the time becomes greater since you saw them last, it is sometimes overwhelming, and you just have to stop whatever you’re doing and cry. He is, and always has been, the most wonderful man I know. His life and contribution to this world was significant. He left things, and places, and situations better than he found them. People were always touched by his love and sensitivity to them and their welfare. He worked hard all his life. He served others and made contributions that are still blessing those he loved. He wrote stories and histories and shared them with everyone. He served our country. He loves our Father in Heaven, our Savior, and has a testimony of the Restored Gospel of Jesus Christ. His example is one that I will work the rest of my life to try to emulate.
When I heard the news, I was devastated, but not surprised. He has struggled with a heart wearing out for years. It finally said, “Enough, you’ve done enough.” He was traveling with my little brother, and his wife, and her parents when he passed. I knew that they would be sad, wondering if the trip was too much, but I believe it was a great send off. They traveled up the west coast of the United States, starting at San Fransisco where my parents met, and ended up in Victoria, Canada. While traveling home, they planned to visit my Dad’s older sister, his only living sibling. He passed away at her home. He may have been holding on to see her. My sweet Mama came home without him, and now will be there in their home without him. She is heart broken. Their 64th anniversary was the week after he passed.
The funeral was wonderful. How could it not be? When you celebrate the life of someone like my Dad, it really is a celebration! Many came to pay their respects. Many had stories about how my Daddy had blessed their life, or how much they admired him, or how something he did at the Family History Center was inspired. It was wonderful to hear stories about how great he is to others. And now we just mourn, and try to get used to life without him here.
I really feel that time spent with family is the most important way to spend time. I will miss time spent with my Dad for the rest of my life. I will miss seeing him most every Sunday for dinner. I will miss our monthly dates, and cutting his hair, and trimming his beard. I will miss him calling and my Daddy’s ring tone of Louis Armstrong’s “What a Wonderful World”, playing. When I hear that song, I can’t help thinking about him.
I worry about my sweet Mama. “Is she ok?” “I better call her and check on her.” “I need to take her to lunch.” “What can I do to love her and help her?” These, and more, are all thoughts in my mind several times a day. She’s seems to be doing quite well. Amazingly well.
I am thankful for our strong family bond. I am so thankful that I know that he loves our family and that we love him. We saw him often, and tell each other all the time how much we love each other.
The times I struggle most are when I’m feeling sorry for me. I believe with all my heart that my Daddy is in a better place. He is happy and very busy doing great things and blessing others. Before he passed, he was uncomfortable and frustrated that he couldn’t do what he used to be able to do. He can do anything now. He is at peace and so are we because he lived a great life. His legacy is one of love, service, sacrifice, work, developing talents, faith in God, righteousness, and having fun while he did it all. At the very center of his life was his sweetheart, my Mama, and family. We will all be together in heaven some day.
I love him, and I’m so grateful he is my Daddy.
When I learn about an ancestor there is a list of things I want to know about them. Three of them are:
Where is this town/city/country that they lived? I find it quick on a map.
What did they do for a living? I sometimes have to look this up.
What was their cause of death? Most the time, at least in the beginning, I always had to look this up.
When I learn the answers to these three questions, I usually have an immediate appreciation for them. I think, “Wow, they lived in that tiny village?” or “I’ve never heard of this disease.“
When I was looking at the information our family has on my paternal 2nd great grandpa Ole Olesen Halling, I looked at his cause of death. He died when he was 86, from a disease called Pemphigus. I looked it up on the internet.
The disease looks terrible.
This is the description I found: Pemphigus causes blisters on your skin and mucous membranes. The blisters rupture easily, leaving open sores, which may ooze and become infected. Pemphigus is an autoimmune disorder. Pemphigus can occur at any age, but it’s most often seen in people who are middle-aged or older. It tends to be a long-lasting (chronic) condition, and some types can be life-threatening without treatment. Treatment with medication usually controls it.
Of course there is a lot more information. I won’t share any more, except to say that the disease exists today, and is treated with steroids. Knowing that Ole died in 1902, I looked up when steroids were first discovered as a medication that can treat disease. I found that it was not discovered or used for treatment until 1950. This made me feel sad for him. I’m sure he suffered a lot, from the disease and did not have much relief, at least not what they use now to treat it. The disease finally caused his death.
What a trooper he was. He was 86 when he died. He lived for a time with a painful disease. I love him. I am encouraged to do my best knowing that he held on during his life. He lived his life, had a family, worked, came to America. It might not have been pretty, but he kept going.
We can do hard things.
That is what I think of when I think of Ole Olesen Halling. What a good man. I want to meet him someday, and tell him thank you for being strong and enduring.
When I was around 8 years old, we lived in the country. We rode the bus to and from school. Us old people like to say, “When I was a kid, we walked up hill, both ways to school…in a blizzard.” It wasn’t quite that bad, but there were a few things that made getting to school, and then back home, (when I was a kid) more challenging than it is these days .
1-The bus stop was a mile from our home.
2-From kindergarten until 5th grade, girls weren’t allowed to wear pants to school. That is hard to believe now. I wore shorts under my dress, so I could play on the monkey bars, and sometimes I’d wear pants under my dress till I got to school then take them off.
3-When it snowed, it really snowed. It has changed, but we used to jump off our balcony into the snow that was not that far down. My legs would freeze on the way to the bus stop. Sometimes I had pants on, sometimes not.
4-Parents never worried about strangers stealing their kids, so none of the parents took their kids to school.
I have all kinds of stories about going to school and then coming home.
Let me tell you about the time there was a very big, scary, obstacle between the bus stop and home. Something that could prevent me from getting home, or so I thought. That big scary thing was also hairy. Our neighbors around the corner from our house had a dog…a St. Bernard. At one time, I felt pretty comfortable with the dog, until it bit me. It wasn’t a bad bite. It was more like a warning bite, that just meant don’t mess with me or I’ll eat you up. And for some reason, I didn’t tell anyone about it. But after that I was scared to death of the dog. This dog lived on the road I had to go on to get home; sometimes the dog was tied up, sometimes not. This was in the country, so I couldn’t just go an extra block and back track to make it home. On this one day, I just didn’t feel confident that I could make it past the house where the dog lived without having a problem. I decided that instead of going home the usual way, I would go behind the house where the dog lived and make my way through the field until I got past the house and then go back to the road. What a great idea, I thought. So I started around the back of the house, making sure not to get too close to the house in case the dog was out and he would see me. My main goal was to not have to pass the house on the road. Within a short time, I realized that the area behind their house was the biggest sticker patch you’ve ever seen.
On this day, I had worn my lace tights. They were my favorite.
When I finally made it past the house and back to the road, I realized my tights were ruined. I didn’t have a lot of nice things back then, so I was pretty devastated about the tights, but at least I was alive and didn’t get attacked.
I don’t know if my mom ever saw the ruined tights, because I hid them in the very back of a play cupboard that my grandpa had made me. If she saw them, she never said anything.
I’ve thought a lot about that experience, and how because I didn’t tell anyone about the dog, I faced it alone. I didn’t feel brave enough, or stupid enough, to go home the normal way, so I tried to make my way around the problem and ended up with another experience that I wasn’t very happy about either. What should I have done different? I know as a child I felt alone a lot. I actually was alone, a lot. I thought I had to work things out on my own. I should have told my parents about the dog bite. Then they could make sure the neighbor kept their dog tied up, or in the house. I must have told my parents about the dog after that experience, because I don’t remember worrying about him after that.
I wish I could tell that little girl a few things, like:
Don’t ever feel like you’re alone. There will always be someone to help.
Ask for help. And if you don’t get the help you need, ask someone else.
Be brave and go through the challenges you face. Don’t try to go around them. It may not help at all, and it may make things worse.
I’m grateful for all of the experiences I’ve had. I always learn something, and I think it helps me see it in others when they struggle. When I see it in others I can then tell them I understand. “You’re not alone”; “I’m here to help”; “You are very brave”; and “If you need help getting home, I’m here.”
My Darlin and I have been married for 34 years.
I’m so grateful for him.
He is definitely a keeper.
Some of the things we’ve learned in the years we’ve been married are what keep us married. Being married is work. It is full of challenges, frustrations, complete happiness, disappointment, and feeling loved. I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
Things I’ve learned in 34 years:
Bonus: The most important thing I’ve learned is that God wants our marriage to be successful. He is a part of our everyday. We ask Him to bless our marriage, and help us to be patient and loving, and happy together. If you include God in your marriage He will bless you. Ask yourself if how you treat your spouse is ok with Him. If it’s not, do better. If it is, continue on in your wonderful journey.
Happy Anniversary to the best man for me! I love you sweetie! Thanks for being my darlin!
I have a dear friend named Julie.
She has been my best friend since high school. We have been friends for long enough that we have some pretty troubling and embarrassing stories of our time together. I am amazed we made it though some of them. I’m so thankful we did. She is a gem. So loyal, and generous, and fun!
We have had this friendship and history for years, before we both got married. Then we both got married the same year within a month of each other. Both of our husbands names are Brett. Only her hubby’s only has one “t”. We started having our children within a year of each other. Because we love each other and we like to be with each other, as our children were born, they became friends. The kids don’t quite match up as far as ages go, but each of our kids are very close to each other. We used to call them our chosen cousins.
Let me add here that she has lived 350 miles away from me since just after we both got married. You have to put a big effort in to stay best friends when you live far away from each other. Also, we used to write letters to each other, because it cost too much to call and talk. Now we have cell phones and communicating is easy.
Our children are all adults. Almost all of them are married. Most of the married ones are parents.
We haven’t had all our kids together for years. They are all so busy and when my darlin and I visit them, it’s usually just the two of us.
We told Natasha we were going to visit with our friends and have a reunion. She says, “Now how are we related to them?” Kelsey said, “We’re not.” Natasha said, “What!!! We’re not related to them?” Haha, we laughed and laughed. All this time she thought they were family. Well, they are! We chose them.
So we had a reunion this last week in a little town in central Utah named Marysvale. It is an old mining town. There are lots of trails for riding 4 wheelers and hiking. We had so much fun! All of our kids and their spouses and grandkids where there. Wow! We know how to multiply.
What a fun time we had! It was very crowded, noisy, and fun!
I love our chosen family. And my bestie Julie!
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